Sometime Around Midnight
by BluEyes
Summary: Starts during TOA the Beach. Rachel and Chandler don't get who they're going after.
1. Couple Number One

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 1: Couple Number One**

~.~

_Turns out I can't not write, so…I'm starting another series! This starts during TOA the beach/TOW the jellyfish….I started this months ago and went nowhere with it, but now have somewhere to go, so…yay :) The first three chapters are setting the rest of the story up, so…yea, this is only a third of the set up. Make no assumptions yet._

_The title is from the song by The Airborne Toxic Event. Great song. Beautiful and super heart-breaking. Go listen to it :)_

~.~

Rachel sighed heavily as she collapsed onto the bed, emotionally drained and knowing the night wasn't even close to over. She stared at the ceiling, expecting Ross to be following her up there at any moment. At the knock on her door, she sprang up in bed, glad she had been right. "Come in!"

"Hey, Rachel," Bonnie, not Ross, walked through the door, holding a bottle of after-sun lotion. Rachel tried to hide her disappointment, forcing a smile. "Sorry to bother you, but could you help me? My head got burned being outside all day….."

"Yea, no, no problem," Rachel nodded, suddenly feeling rather guilty that she had just kissed this woman's boyfriend moments earlier, even if she didn't like her. The sole reason she didn't like her was because she was dating Ross; Bonnie had never _really _done anything wrong to Rachel. Rachel tried to tell herself that, at least, as she moved to the edge of the bed, Bonnie sitting beside her and handing her the bottle. Making a face at putting the lotion on Bonnie's bare scalp, Rachel rubbed it in quickly, wanting nothing more than for Bonnie to leave at that exact moment. "All done," she tried to fake cheerfulness as she finished up.

"Oh, thanks a million, Rachel," Bonnie thanked her as she stood up.

"You're welcome a million," Rachel replied, though not as sincerely, hoping the fakeness didn't show through.

"I can see why Phoebe always talked you guys up so much," Bonnie smiled. "You're all so great."

"Oh, we're not all _so_ great," Rachel attempted to brush off her comment, still feeling slightly guilty.

"Yea, you really are," Bonnie again smiled. "Well, I'm gonna head off to bed. Thanks again, Rach," Bonnie added before walking out the door.

The second the door closed, Rachel dropped her fake smile, sighing as she sat back down on the bed. Ross wasn't coming. Did she even want him to come up there after her? Of course she wanted him to come after her. Although she was still having a hard time forgiving him for cheating on her, she still loved him very much, and seeing him with someone else was completely killing her. It was like seeing him with Julie all over again.

Could she forgive him enough to even be with him again, though? Rachel sighed, getting up and going over to a small desk in the corner of the room. Opening one of the drawers, she pulled out a pen and a pad of paper. She was going to make a list. That was one way to solve this problem: a list. Not that a list had done much good for Ross in the beginning of their relationship, but she needed to logically look at her feelings right now to make this decision.

As she started to make her list, writing down reasons she could picture herself with Ross again versus reasons she couldn't, she smiled; Monica would be very proud.

~.~

Ross walked up the stairs with a heavy sigh, having just watched Bonnie leave in a cab. When she came back to their bedroom after Rachel put lotion on her sunburned scalp, Ross had been waiting for her, and said they needed to talk. It had been a long talk, but by the end of it, Bonnie hadn't even wanted to stick around while Ross figured things out with Rachel. She wished him luck, said it had been fun, and then called a cab and headed back to the city.

When Ross reached the top of the stairs, he looked towards Rachel's door, knowing that's where he was heading. Really, that's probably where he should have headed first, not to Bonnie's room. Rachel was probably asleep by now; she had come upstairs hours ago. Why didn't he go talk to her first instead of Bonnie? That would have made too much sense.

Seeing the light still on under the door as he got closer to her room, Ross smiled. Lightly tapping on the door first, he then opened it, finding Rachel sitting on her bed, leaning up against the headboard, a pad of paper in her lap that she was flipping through.

"Hey," Rachel smiled as he walked in.

"Hey," Ross replied.

"I was just about to give up on you," Rachel forced a laugh.

"Yea, sorry about that," Ross sat on the edge of the bed, and Rachel moved forward so that she was closer to him. "I just had to talk to Bonnie first."

"Oh?" Rachel asked, trying to hide the nervousness in her voice.

"She just called a cab and left," Ross added, off her tone.

"Oh," Rachel tried to fake sympathy, but Ross laughed at that.

"So," he shrugged, reaching out for her hand as they stared each other in the eye for a moment in compete silence.

"I made a list," Rachel finally said, pulling away from him.

"What?"

"I made a list," Rachel repeated, grabbing the pad of paper. "I just, while I was waiting for you, I did a lot of thinking, about us, and before I can even think about getting back together with you, I just need to know if we're on the same page about all of this…."

"All of what?" Ross asked, sounding rather uneasy as he grabbed the pad of paper from her, skimming it as he flipped through it, the happy look on his face dissolving completely as he flipped through page after page. "So, is this a list of everything I ever did wrong in our relationship, or…?"

"Well, and everything you did right," Rachel corrected him. "That's what the right-hand column is," she attempted to point it out.

"Whoa-whoa-whoa," Ross stood up as he got to the last page. "You want me to take full responsibility for everything that went wrong in our relationship?" Rachel didn't speak, just raised her eyebrows, as if that should have been understood since that's what she wrote down. "Y'know what, Rach, no," he shook his head fiercely, throwing the pad of paper down on the bed. "It took two people to break up our relationship," he motioned back and forth between them.

"Yea, you and that girl from the copy place," Rachel shot back, just as angrily.

"You know what, Rach," Ross spat out. "This," he again motioned between them, "is not going to happen. If you can't be a grown up and take at least part of the blame for us breaking up-"

"You cheated on me!" Rachel cut him off. "Seems like I was neither of the two parties involved in that act!"

"We were on a break!" Ross yelled, and Rachel stood up, stomping towards her door and holding it open.

"Oh my god, Ross, I can't believe I even thought about getting back together with you!"

"Yea, right back at you," Ross yelled back, walking out the open door and across the hall to his own room, slamming that door shut behind him.

~.~

_Reviews are super motivating, especially in the beginning, just so ya know…. ;)_


	2. Couple Number Dos

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 2: Couple Number Dos**

~.~

_So…I started this a super long time ago. And abandoned it because I didn't like where I was going with it. But, I suddenly decided, hey, I have the better part of the next three and a half chapters of this written, just sitting on my hard drive, so, before I go and start another fic, I should probably post them and finish this. _

_So, I am._

~.~

Rachel sighed, staring at Ross's closed door for a moment longer before heading down the hall, deciding to go for a walk on the beach and pout instead of staying in her room to pout, because that somehow seemed to make the act less juvenile. When she got to the bottom of the stairs, though, she was surprised to see Chandler standing by the counter, attempting to make a card-house out of the deck of cards that Joey had made out of paper. When it fell down and he sighed in frustration, she let out a small laugh, causing him to look up.

"Sorry," she apologized for laughing at him, walking over to join him. "Couldn't sleep?"

"No, someone upstairs kept yelling," Chandler offered a soft smile, and Rachel smiled back slightly in apology. "You okay?" he asked, going back to attempting to build his card house.

"I don't know," Rachel sighed. "Yes. No. Maybe," she again sighed heavily.

Chandler laughed. "Yes, those are the three possible ways to answer that question…."

"Shut up," Rachel laughed as well, heading over to the refrigerator. "There is still one full bottle of margarita mix and half a bottle of tequila," she grabbed both. "Care to drown some sorrows with me?"

"I suppose I could find a few sorrows to drown," Chandler laughed, but then groaned in frustration as his card house again fell down. "Stupid fake cards," he pushed them aside before turning back to Rachel, who was pouring the mix and tequila into the blender. "Whoa, using enough alcohol?" he asked as she poured nearly half of what was left in the bottle into the blender before adding ice.

"I'm just making margaritas," Rachel turned to him. "If you have a problem with that, I don't have to share with you."

"So, you're just gonna sit here and drink alone, then?" Chandler asked as Rachel turned on the blender, grabbing a glass.

"Fine," Rachel grabbed him a glass, too. "But, I hate men tonight, so be nice," she pointed her finger at him warningly before turning the blender off and pouring some into each of their glasses. "Here's to screwing Ross," she held up her glass.

"Figuratively, I hope," Chandler added, and Rachel scowled at him. "Right, screw Ross," Chandler held his glass up to hers, adding, under his breath, "those damn Gellers."

"What?" Rachel asked, looking up at him after taking a drink.

"What? Nothing," Chandler shrugged off her question, taking a drink as well, but coughing at how strong it was. "Oh my god," he coughed again, making a face.

"Something wrong with my margaritas?" she raised her eyebrows at him.

"Nope," he shook his head fiercely. "Though they may require a drinking game to finish," he made a face as he attempted to take another drink. "Go Fish?" he asked, holding up the cards.

"Really? Go Fish is the best drinking game you could come up with?" she stared at him. "Is that even a drinking game?"

"Rach, did you not go to college?" he asked, beginning to shuffle the cards. "_Anything_ can be turned into a drinking game…."

"Didn't Joey say that last night?"

"No, he said that anything can be turned into a _stripping_ game," Chandler corrected her as they both sat down at the table. "I'll let you keep your clothes on," he winked at her jokingly, beginning to deal out the cards.

"Always the gentleman," Rachel shook her head at him, picking up the cards in front of her before taking another drink of her margarita.

~.~

Rachel woke up, head pounding so loudly she was having trouble hearing her own thoughts. Or, rather, she was having a hard time coming up with a single coherent thought. Groaning, she began to remember the events of night before. Not getting back together with Ross, making margaritas, playing card with Chandler…and that about as far into the night as she could get. Squeezing her eyes shut still, she rolled over, rolling into someone else. Heart pounding, she tried to remember the rest of the night. Did she come back up to Ross's room? Did they make up? She didn't remember. This couldn't be good. What the hell happened after she was playing cards with Chandler?

"I told you that was way too much tequila," Chandler's voice made her jump, though he had spoke barely above a whisper. She turned quickly to face him, but immediately regretted the move, as it left her head spinning even more. Head in her hands, Rachel tried to think quickly, remember any part of the night before that would have left her in bed with Chandler.

"What the hell happened last night?" she finally asked, removing her hand from her head before looking under the covers, noting that they were both fully dressed before breathing out a sigh of relief.

"You mean besides finishing off that bottle of tequila?" Chandler attempted a joke, but Rachel just glared at him, wondering if he felt as horribly as she did at that moment, how he could be making jokes. "Sorry," he added quickly. "I don't know, Rach," he rolled over, burying his head in his pillow. "I don't remember much after we started playing cards," he mumbled into the pillow, and Rachel sighed, the confusion not helping the pounding in her head. Any moment now, her eyes were going to explode, she was sure of it. Making a mental note to herself never to drink again, she closed her eyes, trying to keep down the contents of her stomach.

"I need to go back to my room," she whispered finally, but didn't move to get up, unable to make herself.

"Kay," Chandler mumbled, face still in his pillow. When she didn't move, he looked up slowly, first at her and then at his clock. "It's only quarter til five," he said quietly. "I mean, if you're still as drunk or hungover or on the verge of death or whatever the hell this horrible feeling is as me and can't move, you don't have to quite yet…."

Rachel almost laughed at that, but her stomach told her that wasn't a good idea. Instead she gave him a grateful smile, though his eyes were already closed, before closing her own eyes again and giving in to some much needed sleep….

Rachel woke again two hours later, now finding herself cuddled up beside Chandler, his arm around her stomach. She was still hungover, but now able to function a bit better than earlier, at least enough to get back to her own bed. Trying to get up without waking him, deciding that could lead to nothing but awkwardness, she lifted his arm off of her, rolling out from underneath it. At that action, though, Chandler just rolled closer, fitting his body against hers, still not awake. Rachel stifled a laugh at that, because he had claimed not to be a cuddly sleeper. She would have to tell him differently later.

"Chandler, I need to go," she finally said quietly. "People are going to start getting up."

"Mmm, kay," he mumbled sleepily, moving over enough so that she could get up. "Are you okay?" he added as he stretched, voice hoarse, as she stood up. "I mean, besides being hungover?"

"I will be," Rachel smiled at him. "Thanks for…whatever the hell happened last night. I'm assuming it was fun…."

"Yea, if you figure it out, let me know," Chandler gave her somewhat of a lopsided smile, and Rachel couldn't help but smile wider at that.

"I'll-I'll see you later, okay?" she stumbled over her words, not sure what, exactly, was the cause of the sudden butterfly-feelings in her stomach, but attributing it to her hangover.

"See ya," Chandler mumbled, having already rolled over to go back to sleep.

Rachel tiptoed out of his room, closing the door quietly behind her. Heading down to the kitchen, she decided some sort of painkillers, as well as water, were definitely needed. After searching through a few cupboards, she found a bottle of advil, taking a couple and leaving the bottle out for Chandler to find whenever he wandered downstairs. Turning around at the mess in the kitchen, Rachel groaned. As was clear from the empty tequila bottle, they did, in fact, finish off the tequila. And from the pairs of cards on the table, it looked like Go Fish had been played, as well as some form of the Happy Days game since that was out, as well. Frowning at the scene, she tried hard to remember what had happened the night before.

Deciding that going for a walk on the beach might clear her head, and unable to sleep anymore through the pounding of her head, she headed outside into the cool morning air and down towards the beach.

~.~

Monica and Joey both looked up from the kitchen table as Chandler came down the stairs, still wearing his crumpled up clothes from the day before.

"Are you the maker of the mess?" Monica asked him as he walked over to the counter, grateful that his wish for advil had been magically granted, and a bottle of it was already sitting out.

"What?" he asked, turning slowly to face them.

"The maker of the mess," Joey repeated quietly, motioning to the mess Chandler and Rachel had left from the night before. "Monica's not too happy about it…."

"Oh, I guess I'm half of it," he continued talking quietly. "And, please, stop yelling," he added, sitting down at the table as well, rubbing his temples.

"Who's the other half?" Joey asked.

"Rachel," Chandler mumbled, staring at the glass of water in front of him as he tried to decide if going upstairs to puke would make him feel any better or not.

"What the hell did you guys do last night?" Monica laughed at his current state, starting to pick up the cards on the table.

"Well, we obviously played Go Fish the drinking game, followed by the drinking version of the Happy Days game," he motioned to the table. "While managing to finish the rest of that bottle of tequila," he nodded slightly towards the bottle on the counter.

"So, like, drinking, strip Happy Days game?" Joey nudged Chandler, who shook his head slowly.

"Nope, just drinking Happy Days game."

"Dude, if you play a drinking game alone with a girl, it's supposed to lead to a stripping version of a game…."

"So, did you two just suddenly decide you hate your livers, or…" Monica ignored Joey's comment.

"No, her and Ross had a big fight, so she was really upset," he shrugged, "and I guess I was just along for the ride…."

"Good morning," Rachel walked in the front door in much better shape than Chandler currently was in.

"How are you not about to die?" he groaned, leaning forward with his elbows against the table.

"I guess I can just handle my alcohol better than you," she smiled at him. "Although I did take about eight advil and drank a good gallon of water earlier," she added, sitting at the final spot at the table.

"Sorry about you and Ross," Joey looked at her sympathetically.

"Yea, well," Rachel shrugged, watching as Monica stood up and walked over to the refrigerator.

"Shoot, we're out of soda," Monica sighed in frustration, closing the door again.

"Oh, I'll go out and get you some," Chandler turned around to face her.

"Really?"

"Nope, 'cause I'm not your boyfriend," he smiled at her for only a second before turning back towards Rachel. Rachel caught his eye for a moment before he looked down, and she suddenly remembered what his reason had been for drinking the night before. At his avoidance of any further eye contact, she realized he had remembered it, too.

~.~

"_But what'id- what did you mean earlier?" Rachel asked. "Do you have any eights, by the way?"_

"_Go fish," Chandler shook his head. "And what did I mean by what?"_

"_What'id you mean by 'damn Gellers?'" Rachel asked, slurring her words slightly. "And you are lying! There are no more fish," she pointed to the table, where there were no cards left._

"_I'm not lying," Chandler leaned forward, showing her his cards. Rachel frowned for a moment._

"_Oh, wait! I have two eight's!" she laughed, laying the pair down. "Do I drink for that or do you?"_

"_I think we both drink for that," he grabbed his glass, clinking it to hers before they both took a long drink, the alcohol going down much easier now that they were already drunk. "I'm not boyfriend material," he finally said, and Rachel looked at him inquisitively._

"_What?"_

"_I'm not boyfriend material," he repeated. "Do you have any three's?" he added, and she handed him her three._

"_Why not?" Rachel asked._

"_Ask Monica," Chandler shrugged, frowning at his cards._

"_Why would she know?"_

"_Because she's the one that thinks it."_

~.~

It wasn't that Chandler was upset about not being boyfriend material, no. He was upset that _Monica_ didn't think he was boyfriend material. Looking back up, Chandler caught Rachel's eye for a moment before breaking the eye contact and standing up.

"Well, I'm going to go shower," he mumbled, heading towards the stairs. Rachel started after him, trying to remember other tidbits of the night, but coming up with nothing other than playing card games, drinking, and laughing.

Turning back to Monica, who had gone back to cleaning up the kitchen, Rachel watched her for a moment, wondering if she knew what doing what she probably thought was joking around with Chandler was actually doing to him, and wondering if she liked him, too. Rachel felt a tinge of jealousy at that, but brushed it off. She was all thrown off today; too much drinking and not enough sleep.

"I'm going to go take a nap," she finally announced before heading upstairs, not waiting for Joey or Monica's response to that. At the top of the stairs, as she walked by Chandler's room, he was walking out, about to head down the hall to the bathroom. They both awkwardly tried to move out of each other's way for a moment before laughing.

"Here, you move here," Chandler grabbed her shoulders, moving her over. "And I'll go this way," he grinned, moving past her. As he made eye contact, though, Rachel suddenly realized where the weird feelings for him today were coming from: there had been kissing last night.

At the physical contact with her, Chandler suddenly remembered a few more parts of the night before as well, both of them standing in awkward silence and staring at each other, trying to figure out what to do with that.

~.~

"_But __**why**__ doesn't Monica think I'm boyfriend material?" Chandler asked as he finished off yet another margarita. "We need more margaritas…."_

"_There are no more margaritas," Rachel, who was now, for some reason or another, actually sitting on the kitchen table, sighed sadly._

"_In the world? What will the college kids on spring break drink?" Chandler asked with much seriousness, and Rachel laughed so hard she almost fell off the table, but caught herself before she did._

"_Ohh, you're funnier when I'm drunk," she pointed at him, reaching for her glass, but then frowning as she realized it was empty as well._

"_I'm funnier when I'm drunk?"_

"_No, I said it right the first time," Rachel shook her head._

"_Huh," Chandler thought for a moment before shaking his head to get back to the topic at hand. "I think we're thinking of this the wrong way."_

"_Thinking of what?" Rachel looked up from the cards she had been picking up from the table. "The college kids?"_

"_Why I'm not boyfriend material, c'mon, Rach, keep up," Chandler sighed, leaning onto his elbows against the table. _

"_Right," Rachel scooted closer to him, crossing her legs and sitting up straight. "Okay, go," she clapped her hands together, ready to listen._

"_Okay, I think that instead of focusing on why I'm not boyfriend material, we should focus on what Monica thinks is boyfriend material."_

"_Okay…."_

"_Okay, now you go," Chandler looked at her. "You're a woman. What makes a man boyfriend material?"_

"_Hm," Rachel thought for a moment. "Okay," she again clapped her hands together. "Having a job. You have a job."_

"_I do have a job," Chandler nodded._

"_Um, physical attractiveness, because, we're not gonna lie, looks do matter," she paused, looking him over. "I think you're okay there."_

"_Not the strongest answer, but okay," Chandler frowned at her._

"_Let's see, let's see…"_

"_Indecisiveness here might help explain why you ended up with Ross…." _

"_No, __**you**__ help explain why I ended up with Ross," Rachel looked at him sternly. "I blame you for that."_

"_What?"_

"_I didn't like him until you told me he liked me! You and your damn crystal duck theory! All your fault. All of it. The past two years, all your fault," she pointed at him._

"_Kind of harsh, but okay," Chandler shrugged. "If that makes you feel better…."_

"_No, it doesn't make me feel better!" Rachel jumped off of the table. "Us being able to work would make me feel better. Understanding exactly at what point we went wrong, somewhere before the whole, 'we were on a break' fiasco, __**that**__ would make me feel better. Never being with him and not knowing what I'm missing out on by no longer being with him, that would make me feel better," Rachel ranted, and Chandler watched her pace back and forth, unsure of what to say to that. "You have to have chemistry with someone," Rachel finally said, softer, as she sat down in the chair beside Chandler._

"_What?"_

"_Job," she counted on her first finger, "attractiveness," she held up another finger, "chemistry," she held up a third finger, and Chandler realized she was dropping the subject of Ross._

"_Oh," Chandler sighed. _

"_No, I think you're good there. Me and Phoebs have actually talked about it before, and you two definitely do," Rachel continued, still sounding sad._

"_What else?" Chandler urged her on, trying to get her mind off of Ross. _

"_You have to be able to carry on a conversation with the other person. And, you're kind of a sarcastic pain in the ass-"_

"_Thank you," Chandler cut her off with a grin._

"_You would take that as a compliment," Rachel nodded. "But, sarcastic pain-in-the-ass or not, I think you are capable of conversating."_

"_Is that a verb?"_

"_Definitely," Rachel nodded. "Oh! Good in bed. You can't be in a relationship with someone who is horrible in bed."_

"_Although I've had no complaints, we're definitely getting ahead of ourselves, because she wouldn't know that…."_

"_Okay, well, kissing is just as or even more important than that. You don't even want to get to that next level with someone if they're a bad kisser," Rachel added, and Chandler looked down. "You've kissed Monica before?"_

"_Never when both of us are completely sober," Chandler sighed. "So, you think that's it? What if I'm a bad kisser?"_

_Rachel laughed. "Chandler, I'm pretty sure Monica is just joking around with you. She doesn't think you're being serious."_

"_I'm not being serious."_

"_Yes, actually making that list definitely says 'joking around'…."_

"_Okay, maybe, like, three percent serious," Chandler admitted, pausing for a beat. "What if that three percent is a bad kisser?"_

"_I'm sure you're not," Rachel sighed._

"_Right," Chandler scoffed._

"_Kiss me," Rachel scooted her chair closer to him, a phrase clearly brought out by the massive amount of alcohol that had been consumed in the past couple of hours._

"_What?"_

"_Kiss me. Then we'll know if you're a bad kisser," she explained, and though Chandler was just as drunk as she, he was still hesitant, though eventually did lean slowly in, closing the gap between them as he brushed his lips slowly across her. Rachel was just about to tell him he was wrong, that there was nothing wrong with the way he kissed, when she realized that, not only was he not stopping, but she was kissing back. Hurried, drunken kisses, lips pounding down on each other too quickly for her mind to keep up with. And then, his hands on either of her thighs, pulling her forward, off of her chair, on top of him, still kissing. Her hands were on his chest, gripping his shirt, his on the back of her head, raking through her hair, still kissing._

_They needed to stop. She clung to that thought, knowing that if she let go for one second, this would go too far. They were both extremely intoxicated and needed to stop before this went any further and they both regretted it in the morning, which they surely would, since neither of them was the one the other wanted to be kissing at that moment._

_Slowing the kisses down, Rachel fought herself to take control of the situation, grasping at the last shred of self-control she could find as she finally pulled back, attempting to catch her breath. Staring each other in the eye, they both tried to comprehend what had just happened, but were not in the right frame of mind to figure that out. _

_Finally, Rachel broke the silence. "Definitely not a bad kisser," she whispered slowly, sliding off of his lap and back to her own chair. "I'd recommend you to a friend," she added with a smirk._

_Chandler smiled back, beginning to pick the cards up off the table to play another round. "Thanks."_

~.~

"We drank way too much last night," Rachel finally whispered.

"Way too much," Chandler agreed.

"I'm gonna go nap," she pointed to the bedroom down the hall.

Chandler nodded, pointing in the opposite direction. "I'm gonna go shower."

They both headed in their own direction, and that was as far as they got actually talking about anything that may have transpired the night before.


	3. Couple Number Trois

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 3: Couple Number Trois**

~.~

"Gin," Monica grinned, setting down her cards. They were sitting at her kitchen table playing cards. The trip to Montauk came to an early end, no one able to stand Ross and Rachel's bickering for any longer (which seemed almost worse than after they broke up the first time), and Phoebe upset after finding out that her namesake was actually her birth mother, who had been lying to her.

"We were playing Gin?" Chandler looked at her in confusion, but she gave him a knowing smile. "Hey, ya know, if we were a couple, we could play this game naked."

"Will you stop," Monica looked at him, embarrassed and wishing he would stop with the couple jokes.

"Fine," Chandler shrugged, grabbing the cards and starting to shuffle them.

"Okay, alright," Monica gave in. "I think you're great. You're sweet, and you're funny, and I love you," she smiled, and Chandler grinned grabbing a hold her hands on top of the table. "But-"

"Always a but," Chandler nodded, dropping her hands and again grabbing for the cards.

"But, you're _Chandler_," Monica continued, and Chandler nodded.

"That _is_ what people have been calling me for the past twenty-seven years…."

"Chandler," Monica sighed. "You're just, you're one of my best friends," she looked him in the eye as he stopped fidgeting with the cards in his hands. "And I think you're great. I think you're definitely boyfriend material."

"Just not _your_ boyfriend."

"I couldn't date you, Chandler," Monica said softly, offering a small smile. "I couldn't mess things up with us and lose you. I mean, look at Ross and Rachel…."

"Right," Chandler nodded. "If you don't want to date me, just say that. You don't have to try to go and flatter me or whatever."

"Wait, this is hypothetical, right?" Monica interrupted him, needing reassurance of that after the hurt look on his face. "You're not actually asking me out…."

Chandler looked down for a moment before looking back up at her. "Right," he nodded, forcing a smile.

Monica looked at him for a moment longer, trying to tell if he was being serious or not before glancing up at the clock. "I need to go switch my laundry from the washer to the dryer and start a new load," she finally said quietly. "I'll be right back." Chandler nodded as she stood up, going first to her room to grab more laundry before heading out the door.

Chandler stared after her for a moment longer before standing up, heading to the living room to turn the TV on. When he first offered to be Monica's boyfriend, he supposed he had been joking. But he found how funny she found the offer completely brutal. She was the girl he was closest to in his life. Why did she find the idea of dating him so hilarious? Was there something fundamentally un-dateable about him? Did he repel her? He'd always thought they were pretty close, and there could almost be something between them if they would ever stop to acknowledge it. Maybe even-

"Forgot more quarters," Monica cut off Chandler's train of thought as she walked back into the apartment, hurrying to her room to grab more. "Gotta hurry before that crazy cat lady below you guys steals my washer again," she grinned at him for a moment before leaving once again.

"Good luck," Chandler returned her smile before she left, and it was then that he came to a realization.

His question may have started out hypothetical, but it had definitely turned into more than that, at least for him. He had wanted to know, non-hypothetically, that the _possibility_ of dating Monica at least existed. At least if, hypothetically as he had proposed to her in the car on the drive home, there was a nuclear holocaust and he was the last man alive, she would date him. After she shrugged at that, Joey had groaned, telling him to drop it already.

Chandler sighed, staring at the television screen. Maybe he _should_ just drop it already.

"Hey, man," Ross stuck his head in the door. "Is Rachel here?"

"Don't think so," Chandler replied, looking at her open door. "Are you guys avoiding each other again? Because that was the least fun game in the world when you did that last time…."

Ross shrugged. "Who knows. Is Mon here?"

"She just ran downstairs to do some laundry," Chandler replied. "Why?"

"Just wanted to ask her something," Ross started, but stopped as soon as the door opened, he and Rachel staring at each other for a moment before Rachel dropped her mail on the counter. "I was just going," Ross said quickly before hurrying out the door.

"Didn't this not being able to be in the same room thing already happen once?" Rachel asked, motioning to the door as she walked around to the couch.

"Pretty sure it did," Chandler nodded.

"Well, if it's happening again, I'm going to start claiming you guys for next weekend so I'm not stuck alone," Rachel sighed. "Got any plans next weekend?"

"Not a one," Chandler shook his head.

"Now you do. Not sure exactly what, but it will be fun," Rachel continued. "Are you okay, by the way?" she asked, more seriously, as she looked at him, staring at the TV screen.

"Why wouldn't I be okay?" Chandler asked, turning to face her. At that moment, though, the door again opened, Monica walking in.

"I had to fight off Cat Lady, but I won the washer back," she grinned in victory. "Hey, Rach," she added, looking through the stack of mail on the counter.

"Hey, Mon, what are you doing Friday night?" Rachel asked, turning to face her.

"Ross and I are going to our parents for dinner," Monica said, completely unenthused as she headed to her bedroom with her basket of folded laundry.

"Completely dropped the ball on Monica, Green," Chandler whispered as he leaned closer to Rachel, who smiled at that.

"I know, I'd better go claim Phoebe and Joey before he gets to them," Rachel whispered back. "Hey, um, last night, we didn't, um," she motioned between them, "did we?"

"I don't-I don't think so," Chandler picked at a loose thread on the couch, speaking softly. "I think we went upstairs in search of more cards, because there were more, slightly less legible, homemade cards all over the bed and floor when I got up," Chandler laughed slightly, looking back up at her. "And, we were both fully clothed, and," he again looked down, slightly embarrassed, "if I slept with you, I really think I would remember…."

Rachel smiled at that. "Hey, wanna go get some coffee?"

"I'm pretty sure I'm still hungover, so coffee would be great," Chandler laughed, standing up.

"How are you still hungover?"

"I'm entirely too old to drink that much in one night," he shook his head.

"Okay, you're only a year older than me, so no referring to yourself as 'old,'" Rachel scolded him. "We're going down to the coffee house, Mon," she called out to Monica as they walked out the door.

"Kay. I'll be down in a few minutes," Monica yelled back.

"Besides," Rachel continued, "I don't think you can officially ever refer to yourself using the 'O' word until you're at least over thirty…."

"Right," Chandler nodded as they walked down the stairs.

Before going into Central Perk, Rachel froze, seeing Ross already sitting on the couch with Phoebe. Instead of going in, she kept walking. Chandler followed, having seen Ross as well.

"Okay, I lied," Rachel sighed. "We," she motioned between herself and back towards the coffee house, "are too old to be playing this game."

"Then don't," Chandler shrugged. "Be the bigger person."

"I just, I can't be around him right now, though," Rachel sighed as she stopped walking.

"Then let's go get coffee somewhere else," Chandler suggested. "On the way to work one day, I counted how many coffeehouses there were between here and there, and there were seventeen. Eight of them were Starbucks. I think we can find a cup of acceptable coffee somewhere else within walking distance."

Rachel smiled at his efforts. "Monica's wrong," she shook her head.

"I'm sure she would fight you to the death on that one, but about what?" Chandler laughed as they started walking again.

"You _are_ boyfriend material," Rachel nodded.

"I'm sure the majority of women in Manhattan, or at least the ones I've met, would beg to differ," Chandler scoffed.

"I was trying to be serious, Chandler," Rachel said quietly.

"Oh," he slowed his pace until they both stopped at another coffee house a few blocks away. "Ross is crazy, by the way."

"Why?"

"For cheating on you," Chandler said. "Which, all technicalities aside, he did. You were this girl he put on some pedestal for the better part of ten years, and then he gets you, and he just…lets you go. And not only lets you go, but actively does something to lose you," Chandler held the door open for her. "He's crazy."

Rachel smiled as she passed through the door, happy for what was sure to be a short-lived glimpse at the sweet and serious side of Chandler she rarely got to see. "Thank you," she smiled at him genuinely. When he returned her smile, placing a hand on her back as they headed up to the counter to order, her heart skipped a beat. She shook her head slightly in an attempt to clear it, unsure of this effect being around Chandler was suddenly having on her.


	4. Streetlight People

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 4: Streetlight People **

~.~

_It's a slight blow to my ego to only get one review for a chapter I didn't even like, ha, but I'm going to keep on posting, anyway…._

~.~

"Sorry you got stuck with just me tonight," Chandler apologized to Rachel over dinner at a pizza place down the street from their building that different combinations of the six of them found themselves at many a Friday night.

"That's okay," Rachel shrugged. "Out of you guys, Ross only got his sister, so I still came out on top."

"Right," Chandler nodded, taking a bite of pizza.

"Besides, I'm almost sure there are worse people to get stuck with on a Friday night than you."

"Oh, really. Like who?"

"Oh, ya know," Rachel took a drink of her soda in front of her, "Paul Bundy, Jack the Ripper…."

"Are those the only serial killers you can name off the top of your head?"

"Jeffrey Dahmer," Rachel thought for a moment. "Yea, that's all I've got."

"Well, glad I beat their company, at least," Chandler laughed, pausing as the waiter came to refill their drinks, taking a rather long time to do so. "Thanks."

"Thank you," Rachel added as well, waiting for the slightly creepy man to walk away. "You know who he always reminds me of?" Rachel leaned in closer.

"That bartender? From that bar in college-"

"Across the street from campus! Yes!" Rachel nodded eagerly, glad she wasn't the only one to see it. "God, what was the name of that place?"

Chandler thought that through as he chewed, finally shaking his head. "Got me."

Rachel racked her brain for the name of the bar as well, coming up with nothing. "Wanna go by there when we're done here and see?"

"Oh, yea, definitely."

~.~

"Okay, it was definitely _not_ called Burger King," Chandler let out a sigh of defeat, staring up at the sign.

"How could they close that place!" Rachel exclaimed, staring up at the sign as well.

"I don't know, it was clearly so memorable, we can even remember the name of it," Chandler replied sarcastically, and Rachel glared at him. "Hey, wanna keep walking? Find another college bar we'll be entirely too old to be at?" he asked as he turned to continue on down the street.

"Hey, what did I say about using the 'o' word?" Rachel warned, following after him.

~.~

Chandler stood impatiently at the bar trying to get one of the bartenders' attention, suddenly remembering how frustrating crowded college bars could be and why he was definitely too old to go to them. He sighed impatiently, so Rachel grabbed his arm, moving in front of him and pulling him with her as she effortlessly pushed through the crowd and up to the bar, directly in front of where the bartender was standing.

"What can I get for ya?' he asked as Rachel flashed a grin, leaning forward to order. Chandler watched in disbelief as Rachel handed him a drink and a shot seconds later, taking them from her as she grabbed each of her own and they retreated from the bar.

"How did you-"

"Being a pretty girl," Rachel interrupted him as she darted for a table she saw people leaving from, "does not hurt in moments such as this," she grinned, sitting down on a barstool at the table and setting her drinks down. "Or for getting out of speeding tickets," she added as Chandler pulled up a barstool beside her.

"To being a pretty girl, apparently," Chandler held up his drink.

Rachel looked at him. "Are you a wuss? Take the shot first," she held up her shot glass, clinking it to his as he did the same, both of them taking the shots quickly.

"Really?" Chandler made a face, chasing the shot with whatever was in the other glass, "vodka?"

"When in Rome," Rachel shrugged, motioning to the college bar they were in.

"That," Chandler set the other glass down after taking a drink, "is nothing but alcohol."

"It's a dollar Manhattan Iced Tea. Apparently it's the Friday night special," Rachel shrugged, taking a drink of hers.

Chandler laughed, looking around the bar and feeling a bit ridiculous since they were both obviously a bit older than the barely-legal crowd around them. "Do you feel like you're twenty-one again yet?"

Rachel laughed, as well, glancing down at her watch as they announced that karaoke would be starting in ten minutes, and to get names in now because spaces fill up fast. "Oh, do I ever," she again laughed. "Twenty bucks says you won't sing," she motioned up to the stage and the crowd of people who were getting their name and songs in to sing as she playfully took the straw in her drink between her teeth.

Chandler shook his head. "I don't need twenty dollars that badly." He took another drink of his drink. "A few more of these and I might be easier to convince, though."

Rachel smirked.

"That wasn't a challenge."

Rachel set down her drink, slipping off the barstool.

"Rach-"

"I'm just getting another round," she smiled innocently, motioning to the bar.

~.~

Rachel hadn't known that Chandler was competitive at all. Maybe it was because Monica was competitive enough for the entire group. Maybe it was because he rarely let his guard down enough for anyone to know that about him.

But, whatever the case was, after a few more rounds of shots and Manhattan Iced Teas, and calling Chandler girly for chasing his shots with the Manhattan Iced Teas, and calling him even more of a girl for not getting up there and singing….

Somehow, Rachel had broken him down. And with a wager of doing dishes at Rachel and Monica's for a month and the next round of drinks on the table, Chandler had given in.

He was now onstage. He had only sung karaoke at a bar before once in his life. It was at Ross's bachelor party. And enough alcohol had been consumed that they all should have probably been comatose in the morning. He hated singing in front of anyone. He knew very well he was able to sing, but still hated it.

Luckily, he was enough drinks into the night that he was just past the point of caring about that. Walking over to the microphone as the first few chords of his song of choice began to play, he grinned and shook his head at Rachel, who had moved to a table closer to the stage, his blue eyes glistening under the bright stage lights in the otherwise dimly lit bar.

He took a deep breath, licked his lips, and began to sing.

_Just a small town girl  
Livin' in a lonely world  
She took the midnight train goin' anywhere_

Rachel froze, staring up as he began to sing.

Chandler Bing could _sing_. The other groups around the stage, namely, the groups of girls, began to quiet down as well, listening and watching as the man on stage sang.

_A singer in a smoky room  
The scent of wine and cheap perfume  
For a smile they can share the night  
It goes on and on and on and on_

Good lord, the man could sing. His vocal ability rivaled Steve Perry's for the song. How did she not know this about him? In all of the years she had known him, how could she have completely missed this fact?

The girls around her were whispering, all apparently regulars, as were most of the people who sang, she gathered from the conversation, and they were trying to figure out who, exactly, this "hot guy" who could sing was.

Chandler was hot? Apparently. Or at least to these at least slightly intoxicated college girls. Rachel stared up at him as he continued to sing. Yes. Yes, he definitely was.

_Strangers waiting_  
_Up and down the boulevard  
Their shadows searching in the night  
Streetlight people  
Living just to find emotion  
Hiding somewhere in the niiiii-iiight_

And, said hot guy was staring at _her_ as he sang. Crooned. It was more like crooning, the way he sang. His voice hitting every note, smooth, flowing like molasses. Or dark chocolate. The kind of smooth you could just soak up. Was his voice this smooth when he spoke, too?

And his eyes, his deep blue eyes, shining in the stage lights playfully as he smiled down at her. Were his eyes always so blue?

And then the crowd picked up in volume, singing along with him as he neared the end.

_Don't stop believin'  
Hold on to this feelin'  
Streetlights, people..._

As the song faded, he jumped off stage, thanking the crowd quickly through the cheering before making his way back over to Rachel, seemingly embarrassed.

"I hate you," he whispered, leaning close to her, though the playful look in his eyes said differently. "What?" he added, when Rachel failed to respond, still staring at him in disbelief.

"You can _sing_," Rachel said, astonished.

Chandler gasped. "Is that what I was doing up there?"

Rachel tilted her head to the side.

"Thanks," he smiled, eyes softening a bit as he did. "So I've been told."

"No, Chandler," Rachel shook her head. "You can _sing_. Like, if you ever get tired of…whatever the hell it is you do with numbers," she shook her head again, pointing towards the stage, where another, slightly less well-versed singer had taken over, "_that_ is what you could be doing."

"Singing karaoke professionally?"

"Are you physically unable to take a compliment?"

"Yes, but the doctors are working on it," Chandler smirked, and Rachel hit him playfully on the arm. "I believe part of the deal was another round of drinks?" Chandler motioned to the empty glasses on the table, shifting the conversation, and Rachel smiled, letting him.

"Be right back," she smiled, making her way back over to the bar.

"Dude." Rachel turned around as an obviously intoxicated girl, who might barely pass for being twenty-one tapped her on the shoulder as she made her way back to their table from the bar, drinks and shots balanced carefully in hand. "Your boyfriend is hot _and_ can sing. Marry him," she nodded, her friend nodding eagerly along before heading on their way.

Rachel laughed at the two girls, watching them retreat for a moment, arm-in-arm, laughing to one another before heading back to her table.

"You could have any girl in here you wanted right now," Rachel smirked at him, setting one of the shots and drinks in front of him.

"Right," Chandler laughed, unconvinced.

"Seriously, Chandler. They are all _swooning_ right now," she picked up her shot glass, holding it up.

Chandler clinked his glass to hers before taking it, smiling slightly after. "I made _you_ swoon a little bit," he smirked, taking a long drink, the Manhattan Iced Tea going down much more smoothly now.

Rachel looked down, feeling the flush of her cheeks and neck; Chandler smiled at the reaction.

~.~

"_Why_ is there so much _rain_?" Rachel asked overdramatically as they made their way out of the bar a few hours later, having closed the bar down with a group of girls who referred to Chandler as the "hot singing guy," and, therefore, kept buying him drinks. However, after a few rounds, he had started passing half of them off to Rachel, unsure how he lacked the drinking ability to keep up with a group of girls only five years younger than himself.

Chandler shrugged, staring out at the sheets of pouring rain, the buildings across the street barely visible. "Are you gonna get a cab?" Rachel asked, nodding towards the street, not about to go out in the rain.

"Yea, okay," Chandler laughed at her, not wanting to go out in the pouring rain, either. "Only if you come with me," he grabbed her hand.

"What?" Rachel shrieked, pulling back, but he was stronger, not letting go.

"You keep calling me a wuss tonight. I took vodka shots. I sang karaoke. And you, Miss Green, are not going to melt in the rain," he playfully pulled her with him out into the pouring rain, and she resisted for only a moment before allowing him to pull her with him into the rain, arm raised, as a cab pulled up. Chandler opened the door, letting Rachel crawl in first, following quickly behind.

He told the driver where they were heading, scooting closer to Rachel on the seat, feeling her shiver from the rain, both of them soaked from the short walk. Chandler wrapped an arm around her, and Rachel smiled at the feel of his body heat, glancing out the window.

"Hey!" she pointed out the window to the group of people standing under a streetlight smoking in the pouring rain. "Streetlight people! Like in the song."

"It's streetlights, people. Not streetlight people."

"Pretty sure it's streetlight people," Rachel shook her head.

"Pretty sure you're wrong."

"Oh, but I'm positive I'm right," Rachel grinned. "Positive trumps pretty sure."

"It's too bad you're wrong, then," Chandler shrugged.

Rachel squinted her eyes. "What are we arguing about?"

"The streetlight people."

"So, you admit I'm right then."

Chandler laughed, shaking his head. "You've been living with Monica for too long. She's rubbing off on you."

Rachel shook her head. "If that were the case, I would be capable of making grilled cheese without setting off the smoke detectors. Which I did yesterday." Chandler laughed, and Rachel relaxed into the seat, leaning her head against Chandler's shoulder. "Why don't we hang out more?"

"Rach, I don't know what your definition of 'hanging out' is, but I'm pretty sure that's _all_ we do."

Rachel rolled her eyes, lifting her head to look up at him. "You and me, not the six of us."

"Oh," Chandler replied. "Yea, we don't, do we?"

"We should," Rachel nodded, again leaning her head against his shoulder, cuddling against him for warmth. "It's nice."

Chandler smiled, tightening his arm around her, cold also from the rain. "It is."

Rachel closed her eyes momentarily, letting Chandler's body heat mixed with the feeling of the car ride and sound of the steady rain all but lull her to sleep on the rest of the short drive home, her head too fuzzy to fight it.

"Rach," Chandler nudged her slightly, and Rachel immediately sat up straight, realizing they were home.

"Do we have to go out there again?' Rachel groaned, not wanting to go back out in the rain.

"Unless you want me to keep the meter running," the driver butted in in a thick accent, and Rachel shot him a dirty look before motioning to Chandler to get out.

"On the count of three," he looked back at Rachel, "we run for the door. One," he reached for the door handle with his left hand. "Two," he took her hand in his right hand. "Three," he opened the door, the two of them stumbling out, darting for the building, still hand-in-hand.

The second they were out of the cab, though, Rachel landed in a puddle, water splashing up at them as Rachel nearly collapsed in a fit of laughter, tripping in the hole responsible for the puddle. Chandler caught her arm, laughing just as hard as he pulled her with him, across the sidewalk and under the overhang of the building, running at full-force. Chandler landed, back against the wall, and Rachel let him pull her in, landing against his chest, his shirt soaked. Chandler smiled down at her as they both struggled to catch their breath from laughing, his hands on either side of her hips as she leaned against him, her soaking wet shirt devastatingly teasing.

Rachel smiled, staring into his eyes as the laughing subsided, wondering, for the second time that night, how she had never noticed how blue his eyes were before. And his voice—yes, his voice was always that smooth and intoxicating. And his fingers, his fingers were playing with the fabric of the bottom of her shirt, but she knew the feeling of his strong fingers raking through her hair, digging into her thighs….

And she knew that look. The softening of his eyes, his smile. Last weekend, after she had initiated an innocent kiss, she had every reason in the world to stop it. But, tonight, if he were to kiss her….

Tonight had felt like a date. And this felt like the end of a date. A very fun date she didn't want to end. And, from the look he was giving her, neither did he.

The thought momentarily crossed Chandler's mind that for the past week, while he'd been flirting with Monica just slightly more than usual, being a bit sweeter, trying to show her that he was, in fact, boyfriend material, he might very well have been putting his efforts towards the wrong girl.

He'd never thought of Rachel like that. Never considered the possibility of Rachel Green. And there were probably a million and one reasons for that, but he couldn't come up with one right now.

Chandler slid his thumbs up the curve of her waist, stopping just below her ribcage, eyes still locked, each one daring the other to make the first move, knowing they both knew that's where it was heading.

"You have really pretty eyes," Rachel finally whispered, and over the pounding of the rain, it was barely audible.

"You have really pretty," Chandler paused, looked her up and down, unable to decide which body part won, "everything…."

Rachel's mouth curled into a soft smile at that, knowing what was coming next, and doing nothing to stop it.

As he leaned in, hot breath against the coolness off her cheek, he hesitated. Rachel responded by wrapping her arms around his neck, feeling his shoulders move beneath his soaked shirt as he pulled her even closer, the warmth of his mouth shocking against hers in the cold rain.

"Upstairs," Chandler finally whispered against her ear, his warm breath teasing against her neck as he planted a kiss just below her earlobe, and Rachel nodded, hand still entwined with his as they made their way upstairs and into his apartment. The second the door was closed and locked, wet shoes were kicked off and soaked shirts were peeled off, leaving layers of goosebumps on damp skin as the two made their way, still kissing, towards Chandler's bedroom.

The kissing, however, came to a sudden halt as they crashed backwards into the entertainment center in the dark living room since it was blocking three-fourths of Chandler's doorway. Rachel nearly collapsed in another fit of laughter, Chandler holding her up, pinned against it, as he laughed, as well, drinking in her laughter. God, she had a beautiful laugh. All these years, he had been aiming to make the wrong girl laugh, always quite proud of himself when he'd get a laugh and "Monica look" after making a joke. Rachel's laugh, though….

Her laugh was beautiful, and intoxicating…and contagious. The more Rachel laughed, the harder Chandler laughed, until they were both reduced to tears, gasping for air, still leaning up against the entertainment center.

As they both stopped laughing and caught their breath, Chandler smiled down at Rachel nervously, feeling slightly more sober now that they were back home, though the fits of laughter proved otherwise. "Hi," he whispered, arms still around her, hands resting on her bare lower back.

"Hi," Rachel repeated softly, a warmness in her eyes he didn't recognize, as she ran her fingertips down his bare chest and across his stomach, leaving a path of gooesbumps behind. Chandler smiled as she wrapped her arms around him, missing the warmth of his skin on her own.

Chandler finally leaned down to kiss her again, taking the step and a half to the side so they could go into his room, kicking both halves of his door shut behind them.


	5. The Morning After

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 5: The Morning After**

~.~

_Thanks so much for the reviews :) Reviewers seem to come and go in this fandom in spurts, I've noticed, but it's nice that the same few always seem to stick around. :) I may not say it enough, but I very much appreciate it!_

_I forgot to actually say that the song in the last one was _Don't Stop Believin'_ by Journey, aka, the best karaoke song ever. I don't own it._

~.~

Rachel opened her eyes slowly, the early-morning light shinning in through the crack between the curtains directly in her eyes. She found this odd because she always checked to make sure such a thing would not happen before she went to bed, not wanting to be woken earlier than she had to be for any reason.

She was not her in room.

Chandler's room. She was in Chandler's room.

She had gone out with Chandler last night, and she sure was making a habit out of waking up with him after a night of drinking. Today, though, she was sans clothing.

Oh, that couldn't be good.

No, actually, she was certain that it had been good. Somewhere between the laughing and kissing and everything after, she was certain it had been _very_ good.

It was just past six in the morning. They had only been sleeping for a couple of hours.

Rachel sat up, the only couple hours of sleep explaining the slight spinning of her head at the realization that she was most certainly still a bit drunk, just not as drunk as before. Sliding back down onto the pillow, she rolled onto her side, facing Chandler. He was lying on his stomach, arms under his pillow, hair sticking in random directions from going to bed with wet hair. Well…from doing what they did before they went to bed with wet hair. At that thought, Rachel attempted to run her fingers through her own tangled hair a few times, finally pulling it back and securing it with the ponytail holder she had around her wrist.

She should wake him up. She should go home, so she should wake him up. She should not sneak out. She should not stay there and sleep longer. She should wake him up and go home.

Waking him up, though, would mean having to face the reality of the situation. While he still slept, while they were still in bed, the night before could be fun, and incredible, and…

Incredibly complicated. Ross was his best friend. She was his ex-girlfriend. He would not react well to this. Fun and incredible were bad. The two of them together was bad.

Oh, but he looked so cute there sleeping, and all she wanted to do was curl up with him for a few more hours and sleep off her hangover….

"Hey," Chandler said softly, pulling Rachel out of her thoughts.

Rachel smiled, the two of them at eye-level, both still lying facing each other. "Hey," she replied, just as softly. "I should-I should go home," Rachel continued.

Chandler nodded, reaching out and touching her cheek, brushing a rogue strand of hair from her face. "Probably should…."

Rachel bit her bottom lip as he ran his thumb down the side of her face. Damn, he wanted her to stay, too. "I can think of a few good reasons why I should," Rachel continued in a whisper.

Chandler nodded, dropping his hand from her face, bringing it back under his own pillow. "I can only think of one."

Rachel nodded, knowing that Ross was that reason, but searching his eyes for a reason to stay. "Pretty big one, though," she finally conceded.

"Right," Chandler agreed. "So…you should probably go?"

"Probably," Rachel laughed at the circles they were going in, continuing to stare at one another.

"Want to do something later?" Chandler finally asked, sitting up when Rachel didn't move to get up. "I mean, we decided to hang out more, right?"

Rachel sat up as well. "That we did."

"So, want to do something? Lunch, dinner, movie, shopping, walk through Central Park, coffee, rent a car and drive to Mexico where no one will come looking for us?"

"Canada's closer," Rachel retorted, and Chandler smiled. "Maybe lunch, movie, then see what happens?"

Chandler nodded. "Sounds good." He watched as she moved to the edge of the bed, scanning the floor for her clothes. "Want something dry to wear?"

Rachel leaned over, picking up a soggy pair of jeans, still clutching the sheet in front of her. "Dry clothes would be nice."

Chandler slid out of bed, immediately aware that he was completely naked in front of Rachel, and trying not to be self-conscious about it. He first grabbed himself a pair of boxers and pulled them on before pulling a pair of sweatpants and two t-shirts out of his dresser, handing the pants and one of the t-shirts to Rachel, pulling the other one on himself.

"Thanks," Rachel replied softly, pulling the shirt on before standing up, pulling on the sweatpants that were entirely too big for her, rolling them a few times at the top. Chandler stared at her after she was dressed, and although there was no doubt that Rachel was always hot, and although she could _wear_ a pair of jeans like no one else, and she could turn heads all dressed-up, this was by far his favorite look for her: in his sweats, hair messy, looking at him like she didn't want to leave.

Oh, he didn't want her to leave. It was the Morning After look, and he didn't want her to do the (albeit short) Walk of Shame back to her apartment. No, he wanted her to stay there with him, maybe make her breakfast, take a shower with her, crawl back into bed for a few hours together…. He wanted her to stay.

Dangerous territory. Very dangerous territory.

There were reasons he'd never considered Rachel in this way. Or, at the least, there was one very big reason.

"Are you hungry?" Chandler finally whispered, still half-way across the room from her, and Rachel nodded slowly, both of them tossing that reason aside, as if ignoring it would make it go away.

"I could eat," she whispered, taking a step closer to him. "Can you cook?" she wrinkled her forehead as he took a couple of long strides, closing the gap between them.

"Better than you," he smirked, and Rachel laughed, melting into his embrace as he encircled her in his arms. Rachel rested her cheek against his chest, enjoying the hug for a moment before raising her face to look up at him, to get close enough to kiss him.

And he beat her to it, kissing her the moment she looked up, his soft, warm lips against hers, which somehow still seemed to be cold from the night before. It wasn't making out, though. Just a kiss. And a hug.

"I should go change into my own clothes before anyone gets up," Rachel finally whispered, and Chandler nodded, loosening his embrace. "I'll come right back, though," she added, for some reason needing to assure both him and herself of that fact. "Just…."

"Doesn't look so bad that way," Chandler finished for her, and Rachel nodded, heading for the door.

"No Joey," she nodded towards Joey's open door.

"Probably a good thing he wasn't here last night," Chandler smirked, and Rachel returned his smile as they headed to his front door. He opened it for her, and Rachel smiled, pointing at her front door.

"Well, this is me…"

Chandler laughed, leaning down to kiss her. "See you in five?"

Rachel pointed to her hair. "Maybe more like fifteen or twenty to get this under control."

"Leave it. It's cute." Rachel made a face, obviously disagreeing. "Pancakes or French Toast? We used to have a waffle iron, but…"

"Do I want to know what Joey tried to do with the waffle iron?" Rachel asked with slight disgust, and Chandler shook his head fiercely. Rachel thought through what she wanted for breakfast, finally shrugging, saying what he had already more than done in the past twelve hours. "Surprise me."

~.~

"Ooh, pancakes," Joey grinned as he came through the front door of the apartment. "I assumed it was Monica cooking I smelled, but this works, too," he sat down on the barstool beside Rachel, who was eating at the counter, watching Chandler cook. "I'll take one more," Joey added, seeing Chandler slide the two pancakes onto a plate and grab a fork.

Chandler looked at him. "These are for me," he set them down, grabbing the syrup. Joey pouted. "Fine," Chandler slid the plate over to Joey, turning back to the stove.

"Monica's not as grumpy when she cooks," Joey grumbled under his breath, looking up as the door opened, and the person in question walked in. "Thank god," he sighed with relief.

Monica looked at Chandler cooking, forehead wrinkled, arms crossed, obviously unhappy that Chandler was stealing her role as host. "What are you doing?"

Chandler turned around slowly, knowing that tone. "Making breakfast?" he asked slowly.

Monica looked at him, still confused. "Why?"

"We were hungry, and you weren't up yet?"

Monica continued, arms crossed. "Is that a statement or a question?"

"Mmm," Chandler thought that over, not sure which way to answer.

"Statement," Rachel finally nodded, answering for him.

"Thank god you're here, though," Joey took the last bite of pancake on his plate, pushing it back towards Chandler for more. "He's grumpy when he cooks."

"Am not," Chandler ignored Joey's plate, instead placing the current two pancakes he made on a different plate, cutting off a piece and taking a bite, staring Joey down as he did so.

"**And** he's mean," Joey stood up, heading towards the bathroom.

"Go eat," Monica shooed Chandler out of the kitchen, taking the spatula from his hand.

Chandler gladly retreated, taking the seat beside Rachel. He smiled apologetically, brushing his knee up against hers, the morning not going as he had planned. Not terrible, just not as he had hoped. Not as good as sex in the shower would have been, but…Nope, no comparison. He wanted everyone else to disappear so they could finish their Morning After alone.

~.~

Rachel sighed, leaning against her front door once everyone besides Chandler was gone. What was supposed to be their day alone together had somehow turned into an entire group outing, both of them unable to come up with any plausible reason for Monica, Joey and Phoebe not to come to the movie with them when they mentioned going. They somehow hadn't even gotten to sit together at the movie, and the more time that dragged on throughout the day, the more the possible consequences of the night before began to sink it.

Because they were all spending the afternoon with Rachel, everyone else had promised Ross they would go to dinner with him. Chandler had offered to stay behind with Rachel, though, and Monica thanked him, saying next time everyone else went with Ross, she would stay.

And so, they were alone.

"Hey," Chandler slowly crossed the kitchen, leaving a slight distance between them, unsure if the Morning After glow on the situation had gone away. The day had left them both with entirely too much time to think.

Rachel pushed off of the door, offering a slight smile as she stood up fully. "Hey."

Chandler scuffed his foot along the ground, staring down. "We probably need to talk now, huh," he whispered, not looking up at her.

Rachel bit her bottom lip, nodding her head, face dropping at his tone. "Yea, probably."

Chandler sighed, scuffed his foot a couple more times, and finally looked up at Rachel. She wouldn't look at him. She had the same look on her face as he did. "Is this it, then?" he finally whispered, unsure of what else to say.

Rachel slowly blew out the breath she had been holding, dreading very much whatever it was that was so hard for him to say. She shrugged, dug her teeth harder into her lip, and wondered why those were tears she felt stinging in the back of her eyes. One night. It had been one night. One stinking night. Well, technically, there had been two nights. But, still, she could not be this attached to him.

Ross would freak out. What did she care about that, though? Chandler. She cared about the part in there where Chandler would be the one hurting Ross, and Chandler would suffer the consequences of being with her. She may not care about hurting Ross at the moment, but she cared about Chandler. There was her answer.

"It has to be, doesn't it?" Rachel finally whispered back, still avoiding eye contact.

"I spent the entire afternoon trying to convince myself otherwise, but," Chandler sighed heavily. "Ross is my best friend. And you guys…well, you broke up a while ago, but you **just** decided not to get back together, and it's bad timing. Although, I really don't know if the timing could ever be good in this situation, and I just," Chandler trailed off, again sighing heavily.

"It sucks. I mean, it was only one night, but…it still sucks," Rachel finally looked up at him, and the sadness in her eyes pulled on his heart.

"Oh, come on," Chandler forced a smile, stepping towards her, "you don't really like me. Last night when I was singing probably just reminded you of that time when I was in college, and in a band…"

"Oh my god, that really happened?" Rachel laughed, covering her face with her hands, remembering the night he was referring to when she and Monica had come to visit Ross in college and he had hit on her and the kiss that followed. "Oh, I always hoped I was so drunk I just kind of made that up in my head. Oh my god, that's embarrassing…."

Chandler laughed, as well, smiling when Rachel finally smiled at him. "Want to order Chinese or something tonight? Maybe watch a movie?"

"I thought-"

"As friends," Chandler answered before she could object on those grounds.

Rachel nodded, taking another step closer to him. Dangerous territory again. "Can't think of anything I'd rather do."

~.~

_Reviews, please and thanks :) Next week is kinda crazy for me (my birthday, my fiance's birthday, and going out of town for work), so I don't know when I'll have time to update next, but I'll hurry as fast as I can!_


	6. Que Sera, Sera

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 6: Que Sera, Sera**

~.~

Rachel woke up, this morning in her own bed, but still surrounded by the deliciously unmistakable smell that was a mixture of her and Chandler. She closed her eyes, rolled over, and buried her face in the pillow he had been sleeping on, wishing he was still there so she could roll over and cuddle up with him for a few more hours, and they could have a lazy Sunday morning together.

Dinner and a movie the night before had turned into more than dinner and a movie, just as they had both known it would. Watching a movie had turned into cuddling up on the couch, which had turned into kissing and touching, at which point they had moved into her bedroom….

Chandler had left not ten minutes before Monica and Joey got home, and twenty minutes later, assuming (thankfully, correctly assuming), that both of them had gone to bed, snuck back over and crawled into bed with Rachel for the rest of the night. He'd left around 5:30 that morning. 5:34 to be exact, Rachel noted, but she had rolled back over after kissing him goodbye, content to sleep another few hours in his tshirt in a bed that still smelled of him.

Briefly upon waking up, it again hit Rachel that this could be very dangerous territory they were heading into, but at the moment, it was very hard to care about that. She was too caught up in the newness and excitingness of whatever was happening between them to care too much about the consequences.

Dinner tonight. They were both going to try to get away for dinner tonight, using some sort of excuse. And lunch tomorrow at work. Maybe a slightly long lunch. And, in her head, she added the possibility of meeting up after work for dinner tomorrow, as well. They were obviously both ignoring the dangerous territory they were treading through.

Rachel again closed her eyes, half tempted to stay in bed for a few more hours, nearly content to lie there, smelling like him. However, the thought of getting up and actually getting to see him for those extra couple of hours won her over, and she slowly peeled herself off of her pillow, drug the warm sheets away from her body, and swung her feet over the side of the bed. She picked up a sweatshirt that was flung on top of her hamper, pulling it on over Chandler's tshirt, before heading out into the living room.

The second her door opened, Chandler immediately looked up from the paper he was reading at the kitchen table, smiling slightly. She returned his smile, crossing the living room and sitting in the still empty seat between Monica and Phoebe.

"Morning," she offered to the group as she sat down.

"Morning," Monica replied.

"So, what'd you two do last night?" Phoebe asked, and Rachel didn't fail to notice the immediate smirk that crossed Chandler's face, and was all but sure he was literally biting his tongue.

"Oh," Rachel shrugged, standing up and going to get herself a cup of coffee, needing to break the eye contact with Chandler before she laughed, "ya know."

"Well, whatever it was had to be better than spending the night with Ross, watching some documentary on god only knows what kind of dinosaur," Phoebe rolled her eyes. "There's a reason we never hang out at his place."

"You guys really need to learn to coexist again," Monica added. "I mean, as much fun as you two avoiding each other was the first time around…."

"Yea, no," Rachel shook her head, turning back to the group, coffee cup in hand as she leaned against the counter. "I know. We need to," she added with a nod, sipping the hot coffee, now staring down at the dark liquid as she avoided eye contact with Chandler, feeling his eyes on her. "We will."

Why did everything always seem so much more complicated in the morning?

~.~

"So," Joey asked between mouthfuls of pizza, "ever think you and Rach will get back together? Or is this it for good this time?"

Chandler's head snapped up, away from the baseball game he hadn't really been watching on TV and towards Ross, waiting for an answer, praying for the right answer. Joey had dragged him away to Ross's for the night for pizza and a guy's night, his dinner plans with Rachel ruined.

Ross shrugged, chewing his pizza. "I don't know," he sighed. "I mean, I guess I'd been holding onto the thought of us getting back together since we broke up, but now," he trailed off, setting his pizza crust on the paper plate in front of him. "I don't know."

Chandler bit his tongue. He wanted to ask if he even wanted to get back together with Rachel, but he feared that if or when Ross found out about him and Rachel, this conversation could be thrown back into his face if it went the wrong way.

"Do you still love her?"

And, there it was. God love Joey. Chandler cursed at Joe in his mind for asking that question, cursed at himself for getting into the situation, held his breath, and waited for Ross to answer.

Ross ran his fingers along the edges of his paper plate, tearing at the edges. "I don't know. I don't…I don't think so."

Chandler tried not to audibly breathe a sigh of relief. Not the strongest answer, but not a yes. Not permission granted in any way to date Rachel himself, but at least the guy still wasn't in love with him. So, he was only stabbing him in the back, not twisting the knife.

"Then, if you don't love her, and she doesn't love you, can you guys please stop hating each other and be able to be in the same room again?" Joey almost pleaded, and Chandler laughed out loud at his child-like tone, Ross smiling and nodding in return, promising to try.

~.~

Chandler sat on the girl's balcony, back against the brick wall, unwrapping the cellophane from a pack of cigarettes. He slid the packaging into his pocket, pulling out the lighter he had in there. Pulling a cigarette from the pack, he placed it between his lips, taking a deep breath as he flicked the lighter, the familiar taste and feel hitting him as he held the smoke in his mouth for a moment, finally exhaling. He stared up at the bit of night sky in-between the buildings, trying his best to think of anything but how terrible it had felt to tear himself away from Rachel that morning when he got out of her bed, tearing his limbs and hollows away from her limbs and hollows, and the feelings behind whatever having her on his mind for two days straight implied. Or the feelings behind how, when she smiled at him, his entire world did a few flip-flops.

He knew very well what feelings were there.

Ross.

Ross didn't love her anymore, but they had just ended.

But, he didn't love her.

But…

Chandler took another long drag of his cigarette, closing his eyes as he again slowly blew out the breath.

He allowed himself a side-thought of _best habit ever_ before opening his eyes at the sound of someone else coming out the window.

"Hey," Rachel whispered, and through the sound of the ever-present Manhattan traffic below, he barely heard her.

"Hey," Chandler replied as she sat down beside him, and Chandler smashed his cigarette out on the cement beside him, though it was far from gone.

Rachel stared ahead though he was looking at her, trying to sort out her thoughts before vocalizing them. "Ross and I," she finally began, slowly, "we were always so much work. Even from the beginning, before we were even together, we were nothing but work. Once we were together, we were really nothing but work. But you and I," Rachel turned to look at him, "I know we're at the beginning. I know we're at the easy, fun part. But even that part with Ross was so much work that I don't remember it being fun, and I know that it was never easy. But, I feel like with you," she tried to put into words what they were, the way they naturally fit together, their bodies, their personalities, the way everything between them seemed to flow, smoothly, like the notes of a jazz song, or his voice when he sang.

Chandler shook his head. "I'm a lot of work."

Rachel smiled slightly. "So am I. But I feel like…_we_ aren't. We wouldn't be. We're too much alike to be."

Chandler shrugged, not understanding exactly where she was going with this. "So, what are we doing?"

Rachel looked him in the eye. "We can't say we're nothing and keep sleeping together. Too many people will get hurt for nothing that way."

Chandler again shook his head, sure of one thing. "I'm not going to argue that no one 's going to get hurt this way, too, but... We're not nothing."

"So," Rachel's lips turned up in a small smile, and Chandler tried hard not to be reduced to a useless pile of mush just at that, "are we going to let this happen?"

Chandler returned her smile, swallowing a couple of times before finding his voice. "Yea," he nodded, taking her hand in his, her fingers even seeming to fit perfectly between his. Consequences be damned; he could find a new best friend. "I think we're going to let this happen."


	7. One Down

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 7: One Down…**

~.~

_Thank you guys __**so**__ much for the reviews for the last chapter! (and a big thanks to Robert for what may be one of the kindest reviews I've ever received, but you weren't logged in so I couldn't reply!)_

_As for what Rachel said about Ross, since more than one person brought it up…she was rationalizing. Once you break up with someone, when you're trying to get over them, you tend to focus on the bad things about them and ignore the good things, at least at first (or…is that just me? ha). I don't ever mean to paint Ross/Monica in a bad light in any of my Randler fics (although Ross is far from my favorite character on the show…but you guys know how much I love Mondler, right? I love Mondler to tiny bits and pieces!). Enough defending myself…_

_Anyway… Rachel's rationalizing. As my favorite professor ever said: people are rationalizing beings, not rational beings…._

_And…Que sera, sera is not grammatically correct, but it is a saying/song title._

~.~

Rachel stared blankly at the computer screen in front of her, unable to think of anything but the events of the past weekend and crawling into bed with Chandler the night before after staying up ridiculously late talking on the balcony. She was in trouble. All kinds of ridiculous trouble. Because his smile made her melt, and the way he looked at her made her weak in more parts of her body than just her knees, and thoughts of spending the past three nights with him made her all but useless at work.

"What's his name?"

Rachel looked up suddenly from her computer screen at the sound of Sophie's voice, having no idea what she had been staring at for the past five minutes, or, really, what she had accomplished all morning.

"Excuse me?"

"The guy," Sophie smiled at her knowingly. "I've never seen you accidentally hang up on someone not once but twice instead of putting them on hold, and I've never seen you all happy-smiley-glowy like this, so," she again smiled, leaning closer, "what's his name?"

Rachel tried, but failed, to hide her grin, attempting to straighten a pile of papers on her desk. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Sophie returned her smile. "That good, huh?"

Rachel bit her bottom lip, about to spill, needing someone to talk to about Chandler since she couldn't really say anything to Monica or Phoebe about it.

"Well-"

"I have a meeting in ten minutes," Joanna cut off their conversation as she came out of her office, "Rachel, sit in with me," she motioned for Rachel to follow. "Sophie…" she trailed off, finally turning back around to head down the hallway, "go to lunch early."

Sophie's face fell, and before Rachel could open her mouth to speak, Joanna continued. "Rachel, coming?"

"Yea, thirty seconds, I just have to return a quick phone call," Rachel called out after her, picking up the phone. "Not like I had plans for lunch or anything," she mumbled after Joanna was out of earshot.

"With the nonexistent guy?" Sophie asked, picking up her purse as she did as was told and headed to lunch early.

Rachel smiled in return, dialing Chandler's number as Sophie left.

"Hi, can I speak to Chandler?" Rachel asked as his assistant picked up. "Yea, this is Rachel. Okay, thanks," she replied as she was put on hold, sighing in frustration at having to cancel their lunch plans.

"Hey." God his voice even made her melt. Maybe because he'd never used that tone directed at her before. Maybe because she was in danger of falling incredibly hard and fast for this side of Chandler Bing that she'd been overlooking for the past almost decade.

"Hey," Rachel breathed out in reply, pausing momentarily. "I, um, I can't do lunch today," she finally added, remembering her reason for calling him had been more than just to hear the softness in his voice when his 'hey' was directed towards her.

"Oh, okay." She could hear his voice fall. Oh, he was taking it the wrong way.

"I have to go to this meeting with Joanna," Rachel finished explaining.

"Oh?" His reply wasn't marked with quite the same disappointment this time.

"Yea," Rachel sighed. "I actually have to get going now. But, do you want to do dinner tonight? Right after work so no one can drag either of us away first?"

"Definitely," Chandler smiled. Rachel could tell, from his voice, that he had smiled.

"Okay, I'll see you tonight then?"

"See you tonight, Rach."

"Bye."

"Bye."

Rachel sighed, smiling as she hung up the phone.

Oh, she was in so much trouble. She hadn't been this giddy over a guy since college.

Standing up and grabbing her notepad as she headed towards the conference room, she tried to brush off that giddiness as she walked into the meeting, because if she didn't, she could see the only notes on the paper being doodled in the margins and along the lines of "RG hearts CB."

Oh, she was in _so_ much trouble.

~.~

Rachel sat on the same side of the booth as Chandler at a tiny, crowded Italian restaurant they had discovered a few months earlier at lunch one day. Sitting on the same side of the booth as someone had always seemed rather cheesy, but…this felt okay. Nice. She was definitely okay with his knee brushing against hers every once in awhile, and being able to just reach out and squeeze his hand. Yes, this close proximity was nice. And, in the loud restaurant, all but necessary to hear each other.

"Think Joey will actually sell the entertainment center to anyone today?" Rachel asked, referring to the fact that Chandler had convinced Joey to put an ad in the paper for his homemade entertainment center, and Chandler laughed in return.

"God, I hope so. I've now ruined five work shirts and two jackets just trying to get out of my bedroom."

Rachel smiled. "Well, I kind of like it."

"Do you want it?"

"God, no," Rachel shook her head fiercely. "Besides, after it ruined any article of clothing of mine, I would probably just take a sledgehammer to it."

Chandler again smiled. "A more creative approach to the situation…."

"And if you didn't love Joey so much, you would have done it months ago."

"I would have done it the day he almost drilled a hole in my head while building it."

Rachel laughed, sipping the glass of red wine in front of her.

"Hey, um, I know we've been carefully skirting around this topic, but," Chandler started slowly, hesitantly, "what are we going to tell everyone?"

Rachel stared at her half-empty glass. "And by everyone, you really mean Ross?" she asked quietly, and Chandler nodded slowly.

"I just…don't want to hurt him."

"I know," Rachel nodded, sighing heavily as she stared straight ahead instead of looking at him. "As much as he's not my favorite person in the world right now, neither do I." Rachel paused, thinking through the topic they had been avoiding. "Maybe…we should just…wait a little while. Figure this all out for ourselves before we let him, and everyone else, make a big deal out of it." Chandler nodded slowly. "You don't seem convinced."

Chandler shrugged. "I honestly don't know."

Rachel smiled. "Well, how about we tell him as soon as we can think of a good way to do so and a good time to do so?"

Chandler smiled, clinking his glass to hers at the non-resolution. "Sounds like a plan."

~.~

"So," Rachel whispered as they stopped between their apartments after dinner, "Joey's gone for the night?"

"Supposed to be," Chandler grinned, leaning in to kiss her quickly before unlocking the door. "Locked door," he murmured, leaning in to kiss her as he opened it slowly, "lights are out," he reached for the light switch, not looking away from her as he tossed his keys onto the foosball table before kissing her again, "both a good sign…."

His keys, however, hit the ground with a loud thud. They broke apart slowly, Chandler's mouth open in surprise at the state of the living room, empty other than the entertainment center and god-awful ceramic dog. _God's way of punishing me_, Chandler thought sarcastically before the situation completely set it, Joey's voice coming from the entertainment center breaking the silence.

"Chandler?"

"Oh…my god…" Rachel finally said, hand covering her mouth

"Rach?" Joey's muffled voice asked in shock as Chandler moved towards the entertainment center, removing the hockey stick that was through the handles, trapping him in there.

"Are you alright?" Chandler asked as Joey got out.

"Yea…" Joey sighed, climbing out. "Aww, man, he promised he wouldn't take the chairs!"

"What the hell happened? How were you locked in there? And where the hell is all of our stuff?"

"Well," Joey started, "this guy came by to look at the unit. And-and he said he didn't think it was big enough to fit a grown man-"

"So you got in voluntarily?" Chandler asked, somewhere on the verge of disbelief and pissed off.

"I was trying to make a sale!" Joey attempted to defend himself. "Man, you know what I'm going to do if I ever see that guy again?"

"Bend over," Chandler shrugged overdramatically, heading towards the door.

"Chandler-' Joey tried to follow him, but Chandler stopped him.

"I just-I gotta get out of here for a minute," he slammed the door behind him, leaving Joey and Rachel alone in the empty apartment.

Joey stared at Rachel for a moment, almost as if he knew something, before looking away.

"What?" Rachel asked off of his look.

"Oh," Joey replied, shaking his head, "nothing."

"Then what was that look?" Rachel asked as Joey began opening the drawers in the kitchen to see what else the thief had taken, finally heading over to the refrigerator.

"Oh, man, he took our food, too!"

"Joey, your fridge is always that empty…"

"Right," Joey sighed, but again looked up at Rachel, almost accusatorily this time, before looking back down.

"What, Joe?"

Joey squinted at her for a moment. "Nothing," he finally replied. "I was just surprised it was you that Chandler was with."

"What? Wh-why would that surprise you?" Rachel leaned nervously against the counter.

"Oh, no reason," Joey shrugged. "Just, when Chandler opened the door, I swore it sounded like he was making out with someone."

Rachel shook her head. "How do you _hear_ someone making out?"

Joey cocked an eyebrow. "You want, like, a demonstration, or…"

"No," Rachel shook her head, interrupting him. "Because, that's obviously not what you heard, so," she shrugged, standing back up straight.

"Right," Joey nodded slowly.

"Right," Rachel nodded confidently, walking towards the door. "You should probably call the police or your insurance company or something."

"Do we have insurance?"

"Or you should go find Chandler, and then do both of the above."

Joey looked on the counter, in the space where the phone used to be, but there was only an empty phone cradle with no phone. "Aw, he took our phone, too!" he scowled in defeat. "Oh, I know! You go home and try to call us, and then, when he answers, we can find the guy who took our stuff!"

Rachel raised her eyebrows. "Is that how that's gonna work, Joe?"

Joey thought about it for a minute before laughing. "Oh, of course not," he shook his head, still laughing. "I'm sure our cordless phone doesn't work from as far away as he is!"

Rachel smiled. "Yes, that's why that won't work," she opened the door. "I'm gonna change, and I'll be right back with our phone."

"And probably Chandler," Joey nodded, sure of himself.

"Joey-"

"Just sayin'," he shrugged, walking towards his room, leaving Rachel to think that through momentarily before walking out the door, as well.


	8. No

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 8: No**

~.~

Joey looked up as the front door opened, Chandler walking in slowly.

"Hey."

"Hey," Chandler replied, closing the door behind him.

"You can't date her," Joey stated, shaking his head at Chandler.

Chandler wrinkled his forehead, that not being the conversation he expected when he returned home. "What?"

"Rachel," Joey continued. "You can't date her."

"I didn't," Chandler shook his head, stopping suddenly. "Did she-"

"She didn't have to," Joey shook his head at him again. "Dude, you can't date her."

Chandler stared back at him from across the kitchen. "What if-"

"No," Joey shook his head. "It will kill Ross. No, actually, Ross will kill you."

Chandler sighed, leaning back against the counter. "I know," he breathed out slowly. "I didn't want it to happen, neither of us did, it just…happened…."

"But it _can't_," Joey repeated. "If you thought that it could, if you thought that it was okay, you guys wouldn't be sneaking around or whatever you're doing right now."

Chandler nodded, staring at the ground.

"I mean, has there been one day, since the day that you met Ross, that Rachel hasn't been Ross's Rachel?"

Chandler continued to stare at the ground. _Yes_, he thought. The first morning he woke up with her, she had stopped being Ross's Rachel. All claims of being Ross's had been broken that morning with one single look. The night she had cried over losing him when they decided they couldn't be together, she stopped being Ross's Rachel. Every time she would smile at him in a way she smiled at no one else in the world, she stopped being Ross's Rachel.

No, actually, the moment Ross cheated on her, she had stopped being Ross's Rachel. Those moments were just when she had become _his_ Rachel.

And it would kill Ross. Ross, his best friend since college. Ross, who had been there for him for years. Ross, his best friend. But, he had cheated on her. He had ended it with her. He hadn't been right with her.

And he was his best friend. And he'd had eternal "dibs" on her from the age of fourteen.

"I can't be with her, can I?" Chandler finally whispered, still staring at the ground.

Joey watched the tortured look on Chandler's face, watched him swallow the knot in his throat. "Do you love her?"

Chandler's head snapped up at that. "What?"

"Do you love her?" Joey repeated.

"Why, would that make it okay?" Chandler asked, a slight bite to his question.

"No, but I would be more understanding about you being an asshole in the situation," Joey gave him a slight smile, and Chandler sighed, again staring at the ground, not knowing how to respond to that.

"We don't have renter's insurance," Chandler finally said, after a moment of silence.

"What?"

"I called, and they said we don't have a policy with them. So," he shrugged, motioning to the empty apartment before walking across the empty living room to his bedroom, dropping both conversations entirely.

~.~

Rachel slowly opened Chandler's bedroom door, the creak of the door echoing in the empty apartment. She hadn't seen him since he stormed out on Joey earlier, but she had figured he seemed upset and needed some space, even if she wasn't the one that he was mad at. She closed the door slowly behind her, making her way through the darkness to his bed. She watched him sleep for a moment, smiling, before crawling into bed, curling up beside him as he wrapped his arms around her in his sleep.

"Rach," he breathed out as she settled into his arms, but since that was all he said, and his breathing stayed steady, she assumed he was still asleep, and closed her eyes as well, giving into sleep.

~.~

"Chandler?"

Chandler stirred slightly at the sound of knocking on his door and his name.

"Chandler, you up yet?"

Chandler's eyes opened wide this time, realizing it was Ross at the door and that Rachel was in bed with him. Glancing at his alarm clock, he also realized he must not have set it the night before, having gone to bed still angry with Joey, both for losing most of his possessions, and for telling him the one thing he had been avoiding telling himself. Another knock.

"Just a second, man," Chandler replied. "Rach," he whispered, shaking her gently. "Rach."

She opened her eyes slowly, misreading the panicked look on his face as mad at her for coming back over the night before and not waking him up. "I-" she started, but Chandler shook his head, covering up her mouth.

"Ross," he mouthed, motioning to the door. Rachel's eyes went wide, looking at him helplessly. "Hide?" he suggested quietly, and Rachel moved to the edge of the bed, sinking down on the other side of it as Chandler stood up, moving to open the door, somehow fearing the worst.

"He-hey, what's up?" Chandler asked, stepping out of his room, closing his door quickly behind him.

"You're not up yet?" Ross asked, slightly confused as he looked at his watch.

"Forgot to set my alarm," Chandler shrugged. "Besides, being robbed seems to be a legitimate reason to call in to work…."

"Definitely," Ross laughed. "Oh, hey, furniture!" Ross motioned to the living room, where there was a futon and a patio table. "I brought over this futon I had in storage, and Treeger said you guys could have this stuff that was in the basement. Joey's bringing up the rest."

"Score," Chandler laughed sarcastically, wondering if rusty patio furniture was better or worse than no furniture at all.

"Oh, and I have that TV in storage, too. That really old one of my parent's-"

"From freshman year? That you have to hit every ten minutes to make the picture come back on?" Chandler laughed. "Better than nothing, I guess…."

"Yea," Ross nodded, looking around. "They got you guys good. I still can't believe you don't have renter's insurance. Joey, maybe. But you…."

"Thanks, _Dad_, a lecture's just what I need right now…."

Ross held his hands up in defeat, heading towards the door. "Just saying."

Chandler nodded, heading back towards his bedroom. He closed the door slowly behind him, sinking back against it.

"We still can't do this, can we?" he said quietly, Rachel still sitting on the floor on the other side of his bed.

"It's not fair, though," Rachel replied, just as quietly, not getting up to face him.

"Well, are we going to go tell Ross, right now? Because I don't see that ending well, not only for us, but for the six of us."

Rachel nodded silently, taking her bottom lip between her teeth, and then her top lip, trying to be okay with it, trying not to need to cry. "It's not fair, though," she finally repeated, and this time, Chandler could hear the tears in her voice.

Chandler closed his eyes, still leaning against the door. "Well, it's not fair to him, either. You guys _just_ ended things again. That happened, like, two seconds ago. And he's my best friend. My oldest friend," Chandler sighed, squeezing his eyes shut a bit tighter, leaning against the door a bit more. "I think-I think it's best that we end it now, before anybody gets hurt."

Rachel laughed caustically. "Right. Before anybody gets hurt."

"Rach…" Chandler sighed, but decided to leave it at that. "I'm gonna go shower," he finally whispered, standing up straight, needing to get away before she stood up, before he could see her face, knowing about half a second of looking into her eyes and he would cave.

Before Rachel could even reply to that, Chandler was already out the door, leaving her alone on his floor to cry.

~.~

Chandler turned the shower water all the way to hot, peeling off his tshirt and boxers before stepping underneath the water, needing to get away from the smell, the feel of Rachel, needing it all to just go away. He closed his eyes for a moment, wishing now, more than ever, more than any of the times he'd walked in on Joey and some girl in the shower, that the lock on their bathroom door worked. Because, at that moment, he wanted to be alone. He wanted the ability to lock himself in the tiny space away from the rest of the world and sulk, because Rachel was right. Of course they were both getting hurt, but, he reasoned, it was much less hurt than the alternative.

"No," Rachel's voice as she tore back the shower curtain made Chandler literally jump.

"Jesus, Rach, what are you doing?"

"No," she repeated firmly, shaking her head. "I'm not done with you. I'm not done with this relationship. So, no," she again shook her head.

"Rachel-"

"No," she cut him off. "Because I don't know about you, wait, no, I do know about you, and this," she motioned between them, "doesn't happen very often. And I like you. And I'm not done with this," she finished, breathing heavily, taking a few seconds to pull herself together. "Now," she continued, "I'm going to go home and tell Monica that I was helping you guys with the whole furniture thing. Then I'm going to shower and get ready for work. And, if you show up for lunch, I'll know that you're not done with this, either," she finished, leaving as quickly as she came, and leaving Chandler in a certain state of disbelief as he stared at the backside of the bathroom door she had slammed shut on her way out.


	9. All At Once

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 9: All At Once**

~.~

Rachel slammed the bathroom door behind her, making Joey, who was standing in the kitchen, jump.

"He-hey, Rach," he smiled slightly.

"Mind your own business," Rachel shot back, having a feeling he'd had a conversation with Chandler the night before. She made her way across the living room and to the front door, slamming that shut, as well. She took a deep breath, composing herself before opening the door to her own apartment.

"Hey," Monica smiled at her, looking up from the newspaper she had been reading.

"Hey," Rachel returned her smile. "Treeger gave the guys a bunch of stuff from the basement, so they at least have some furniture now," she continued, pouring herself a cup of coffee before sitting down.

"That's good," Monica nodded. "What time did you get up this morning? I never even heard you."

"Early," Rachel shrugged, "just couldn't sleep."

Rachel watched Monica, who continued to read the paper, obviously believing that answer. Why wouldn't she, though?

"Hey, um, can I talk to you about something?" Monica finally asked, looking up.

Rachel swallowed. Oh, there it was….

Monica hesitated for a moment. "I'm catering this party for my mom this weekend, and Phoebe and I are meeting with her this afternoon to go over it. How pathetic am I?"

"You're-"

Monica shook her head, cutting Rachel off. "That's not what I wanted to talk to you about. I don't know why I said that. I mean, it's true, but I'm not sure why I said it."

Rachel smiled, now sure she had no idea what Monica wanted to talk to her about. "What's up?"

Monica sighed. "This is going to sound stupid. And juvenile."

Rachel laughed. "Mon, I spent the better part of a quarter of a century being stupid and juvenile," she patted her hand from across the table, "I can probably help."

Monica laughed, as well, before standing up, taking her empty cereal bowl and juice glass over to the sink. "You know what, never mind."

"Okay," Rachel said slowly, standing up from the table, as well.

"Okay, no," Monica turned around. "Do you think Chandler's mad at me?"

Rachel spun back around, a little too quickly. "Wait, what?"

"Do you think Chandler's mad at me? Because, after we got back from Montauk, he was being super flirty and sweet and trying to convince me he could be a good boyfriend, and then, out of nowhere, he not only dropped it, but he kind of stopped talking to me. I've hardly seen him all week, and I don't think he's said more than two words to me since then."

Rachel swallowed, hard. She had never considered the possibility of Monica liking Chandler back. But what she said, and the way she said it. Her over-concern in thinking Chandler was mad at her. Could she? She couldn't.

Could she?

"I, um, I don't know," Rachel finally shrugged. "Maybe-maybe he really did just drop it. I mean, you turned him down, what, five times? I'm sure he just dropped it…."

Monica looked down at the dishtowel in her hand. She looked…disappointed, almost. Crap. First Ross, now Monica. The universe sure had it out for her and Chandler…

"You're probably right," Monica finally sighed, turning back towards the sink. Rachel watched her for a few more seconds before heading towards the bathroom to get ready for work and as far away from the rest of that conversation as the space of their allowed.

~.~

Chandler took a deep breath, standing outside of Rachel's office building. He hesitated slightly at the door, not wanting to go up. He had two reasons not to want to. One of them was the conversation he was about to have with Rachel, the other being the fear of running into Joanna after his terribly awkward date with her a few months earlier.

Chandler looked up, offering a slight smile as Rachel appeared from behind the door.

"Hey," she smiled. She had been betting on him showing up, counting on his presence there. Thank god she had been right and he had actually shown. "Joanna?" she asked, pointing back towards the door, and Chandler laughed slightly, nodding.

"Can we, um, can we go somewhere and talk?" Chandler asked, looking around at the continuous stream of people passing by them, and Rachel's face fell, squinting up at him in the bright sunlight. She stared back at him, forcefully willing the tears in the back of her eyes to stay put. No, he would not dump her twice in the same day. She bit her lip, taking in his slightly scruffy appearance as compared to normal: unshaven face, jeans and an old tshirt. And he looked tired.

Rachel finally shook her head from side to side. "No," she finally choked out. "No," she added, more forcefully. "If we're just going to _talk_, we can do that right here."

Chandler sighed. "Rach…."

Rachel shook her head, taking a step further away from him. "No, if that's what you came down here to do, then do it."

Chandler looked at her, unsure. "You really want to do this, right here? In the middle of a busy sidewalk at lunch time?"

"Well, I don't want to do this at all, so," Rachel shrugged childishly, and Chandler pulled her to the edge of the sidewalk next to the building, out of the way of the passerby's.

"Rach," he again sighed, "You know as well as I do that we can't do this," he spoke slowly, enunciating each word of that phrase: we, can't, do, this. Rachel swallowed slowly. "We can't. If you and Ross hadn't just broken up, or, I don't know, I don't know that there's any point in time where this would be okay."

Rachel opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out, so Chandler continued.

"You know what it feels like when you see an ex that you're not over yet, and they're with someone else? That feeling in the pit of your stomach? How much your heart hurts?" he looked her in the eye, and Rachel nodded slowly, the pain of seeing Ross with Bonnie still fresh in her mind. "Now imagine that other person was your best friend."

Rachel laughed slightly.

"What?"

"My mind went from Ross and Bonnie to Ross and Monica, since she's my best friend." Chandler smiled. Rachel shook her head. "But then I thought about-I thought about when I first found out about Barry and Mindy. And I'm pretty sure that I was over him by that point in time, and she was no longer my best friend, but," Rachel paused, looking down, trying to hold back her tears. "You're right," she nodded. "You don't-you don't want to see that, let alone have to be around that." She added in a silent thought of, _plus, Monica likes you, too_, because she didn't want to be the one to hurt Monica like that. But she couldn't get those words out towards him.

"And I know I like you, and I know this is fun," Chandler motioned between them "but it hasn't even been a week. If something's going to end here, before everyone involved gets hurt and we break our little group up beyond repair…I think, I think this has to be what ends," Chandler spoke slowly, quietly, having a hard time getting the words out.

Rachel took comfort in him being as torn up as she was, but she hated him for it. She hated him for wanting to be a good guy, hated Ross for being his best friend and her best friend's brother, hated Monica for liking Chandler, hated how their whole stupid group of friends was more of a family than her own family, and the thought of losing all of them hurt just as badly as losing Chandler.

Fuck, no, losing Chandler hurt slightly more. She had spent a whopping four nights with him, five if you counted the night at the beach. But it hurt. Because they had been friends already, it hadn't been dating someone starting with a clean slate. It had started on date number seven, a good couple of weeks in, already to a point of knowing whether or not it was going to lead somewhere serious.

Despite herself, Rachel found her head nodding in agreement with him. Because, despite her feelings, despite his feelings, he was right. She didn't want him to have to hurt Ross like that. She didn't want to hurt Monica. She knew the combination of the two would tear all of their friendships up beyond repair. "You're right," she whispered, voice shaky, the rest of Manhattan that was walking past in a blur, going about their day, disappearing, the only thing in her line of vision being Chandler. "I mean, you have to be right."

Chandler almost broke down. He didn't want to lose her. Fuck Ross. Fuck their whole group of friends. No, no, he had thought this through today. Taking a deep breath in, he still nearly folded. "I don't want to be right," he choked out, and he saw Rachel's chest shake in a silent sob at that as she reached up to brush away a few stubborn tears.

"You should go," Rachel finally said, the sentence coming out run together in a single word, _youshouldgo_, because she couldn't manage another breath without breaking down.

Chandler nodded, taking one last look at her, a quick glance into her tear-filled blue eyes, his own chest burning as he fought with himself, finally turning to go. He would get over her. He would get over her.

He wanted to turn back and make sure she was okay. He wanted to run back and take her in his arms and say screw everyone else, they could go away together and just be together.

But he didn't.

He kept walking, hands stuffed deep in his pockets, finally deciding on the subway over a cab, needing not to have to say a word to anyone, needing to continue his internal mantra of _you'll get over her_ until he got home. When he reached his apartment, he slammed the door shut, stomping across the living room before slamming both halves of his bedroom door shut as hard as he could, collapsing down onto his bed.

He would get over her. He. Would. Get. Over. Her.

~.~

_Funny story about why this took so long to update: I just did a 180 from where I was going with this story to where I actually am going now. I had originally written myself into a corner with this chapter, never even able to get to the end of the chapter. It's now half the length and going in a completely different direction than I had intended on going in, but I got sudden inspiration for how to continue and end this yesterday at work, so, here we go! It's no longer as close to being complete, but I think, the other way it was written, it was destined to become an Unfinished Randler Fic. This way I will at least finish it. Eventually._

_Reviews don't hurt for speeding up the writing process. Just sayin. :)_

_The title of this chapter is like the Fray song (...sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same...). I just can't get away from music…_


	10. I'd Burn Up in Your Atmosphere

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 10: I'd Burn Up in Your Atmosphere  
**

~.~

_I, apparently, can't write a Randler story in less than 20 chapters to save my life. I'll try to wrap it up in less than that many more chapters, but…it's kind of the pattern with me…._

_Thanks for the reviews! The funny thing is, I posted the last chapters of this and my Mondler fic at the same time, and while the last chapter of this fic had far more hits, the other fic got more than twice the reviews. Are you Randler fans just closeted Randler fans? Ha! Seriously, though, I appreciate reviews, but as long as I have people reading, and I am getting at least a few reviews, I'm gonna keep going…although, feedback never hurts…just throwing that out there.  
_

~.~

Chandler lay in bed, unable to get to sleep. A week ago, everything had been fine. Why'd he have to go and kiss Rachel and start this whole mess? It was her fault, really, for suggesting he kiss her at the beach. And getting him drunk enough to sing karaoke, and therefore drunk enough to kiss her again.

Or, if he was going to blame someone, he was going to go ahead and blame Ross, because he was the one that loved Rachel for so long and then cheated on her, and he was the reason he couldn't be with her. And the reason Rachel had gotten drunk enough to kiss him in the first place. And blaming Ross was easier than blaming Rachel. Because he didn't want to be angry with Rachel…he was too busy missing her. His bed felt empty without her. He kept hoping the door would slowly squeak open and she would slip into bed with him for the rest of the night.

He knew it wasn't going to happen, though.

It couldn't happen. Which was why he was right to end it before it went too far. Before he went and did something stupid like fall in love with his best friend's ex-girlfriend.

~.~

"Hey."

Rachel literally jumped from where she was standing in line at Central Perk at the sound of Monica's voice behind her.

"He-hey," Rachel replied, forcing a smile.

"Where have you been lately?" Monica asked, wondering how it was possible that she now rarely saw her own roommate.

"Oh, ya know," Rachel shrugged, "work…around…" Rachel shrugged.

"Around?" Monica asked, and Rachel again shrugged, avoiding eye contact. "Do you-do you think you and Ross will make up any time soon?" Monica finally asked as Gunther handed Rachel her usual without even taking her order.

"Thanks," Rachel smiled at him. "No," she then shook her head at Monica's question. "I really don't think so this time."

"But-"

"Would you want to have to be around, say, Richard all the time? Would you want to have to be not only civil but friendly towards him, and to have to see him move on and live his life without you and most likely with someone else? Would you be able to get over someone you see every day?" Rachel cut her off, half referring to Ross, but also half referring to Chandler.

Maybe more than half referring to Chandler.

Monica looked down. "I guess not."

"I'm sorry, Mon," Rachel sighed. "I have to get back to work," she added, picking up the coffee and scone Gunther had handed to her in a bag, hurrying out of Central Perk before she could run into anyone else.

~.~

Chandler hesitated at the door of Central Perk, deciding to walk in when he saw that Monica was the only one there. He had had only a few awkward run-ins with Rachel over the course of the past few weeks—twice in the laundry room of their building, three times in the hallway, once at the coffee shop at lunch time—but she seemed to be making herself scarce so that it rarely happened.

He loved and hated her for it.

He was glad he didn't have to co-exist with her, but it also saddened him she was basically phasing herself out of the group, lifting herself out of the equation altogether. With her absence, they had been spending more time around Ross, and Ross had been coming around more often since she was absent, and no one dare mention Rachel around him, the two of them never facing each other for that much needed closure.

And it hurt his heart not to see her. Although, he could be certain, it would hurt his heart just as much to see her and have to pretend that nothing had ever happened. That he didn't know what she looked like naked, and that she didn't have a special smile reserved just for him.

Chandler all but collapsed down on the couch next to Monica, Monica smiling up at him as he did so.

"Hey."

"Hey," he replied.

"Long day?" Monica asked off his look, and Chandler laughed.

"Something like that," he replied, almost shortly, about to apologize, since nothing on his mind was Monica's fault, but stopped when she placed a hand on his leg, rubbing reassuringly.

He closed his eyes, sinking further into the couch, glad she didn't press him further about his bad day (or week, or month, for that matter) as she leaned into him, and he took the affection she was giving him.

Rachel paused outside the door of Central Perk, watching Chandler and Monica sitting on the couch, talking. She had thought about going in to talk to Monica, but…she couldn't. She couldn't go in there and act normally around Chandler like nothing had ever happened. She couldn't act like Monica sitting so close to him didn't maker her want to claw Monica's eyes out. So, she turned and walked in the opposite direction, and before she knew it, she had somehow ended up in front of the coffee shop she had gone to with Chandler that day she had been avoiding Ross.

Even when she was avoiding him, she couldn't seem to get away from him.

~.~

Rachel needed to get away. Physically, emotionally, she needed some distance. Her first break-up with Ross had nearly torn their group apart. Her second one had left the two still at odds and avoiding each other, and she was now avoiding being around Chandler, as well. And it soon became clear to her that she soon lifted right out of their group. Ross was Monica's brother, so Monica could never cut him out of her life. And she was so peeved at Ross, both for their past and for being the reason she couldn't be with Chandler, that she had no intention of making up with him.

And no one knew about her and Chandler. So no one could even pick sides there.

So, she needed to get away. Away from the man who had cheated on her and broke her heart, and the man she had been falling for at full-force when he put a stop to it.

She couldn't live with Ross's sister and across the hall from Chandler.

Looking around at the tiny studio apartment that couldn't have possibly been one-eighth the size of the one she was living in with Monica, Rachel nodded slowly, already decorating it in her head. Yea, she could make this work. It was good to live completely on your own at some point in your life, anyway, right?

Rachel smiled, turning to the landlady, who had to be pushing one hundred, not even hesitating as the words came out of her mouth.

"I'll take it."

~.~

_The title to this chapter is a John Mayer song (I'm gonna steer clear/ I'd burn up in your atmosphere/ I'm gonna steer clear/ 'Cause I'd die if I saw you/ I'd die if I didn't see you there). Not sure that anyone pays attention to my song references, but, in case someone does..._


	11. Distance and Timing

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 11: Distance and Timing**

~.~

_I got on a roll yesterday…figured I'd keep posting, whoo!_

_Thanks mucho for the reviews!_

~.~

Rachel stole a glance at Monica, who was holding back tears. Goddamnit, why could nothing about this be simple?

"It's…it's for the best," Rachel whispered, and Monica nodded half-heartedly. "I just…I need some distance, from the whole Ross situation…." Monica again nodded, and Rachel took a deep breath, feeling tears sting the backs of her eyes. "It's not like we can't still be friends! We can still hang out!" she added, overly cheerfully, but it sounded fake, even to her own ears.

"Yea," Monica nodded, knowing the unspoken part of that was that it would never be the same. She would not see Rachel nearly as often. Because she saw what Rachel was doing, that she was phasing herself out of their group, and it killed her to see her best friend leave. But she also tried to make herself understand how hard it would be to be around your ex all the time…around someone who cheated on you…someone you had once loved…. "I understand," Monica finally said softly, looking Rachel in the eye. A few other concerns ran through Monica's head, like who was going to help pay rent when Rachel moved out at the end of the month, and would Rachel come to Thanksgiving, because Rachel had to be there on Thanksgiving. And she couldn't just replace Rachel with another roommate. How could she replace Rachel with another roommate?

Monica took a deep breath. "I don't like the whole situation, but I-I understand."

Rachel shook her head. If only she could rewind the past year and a half and play it all a little differently. If only, if only, if only. "I don't like it, either, but…."

Monica nodded, rubbing Rachel's arm. "It's for the best," she finished for Rachel, trying to make both of them believe it completely.

~.~

"Well, that's the last of it," Joey said as he and Chandler set down the last few boxes they had carried upstairs for Rachel. When Monica had asked Joey and Chandler to help Rachel move, Chandler couldn't very well say no. Joey had glanced at him before answering, though, giving him enough time to say no, enough time to make up some excuse, but when Chandler said nothing, Joey had agreed for the both of them.

Maybe he hadn't come up with an excuse because he wanted the excuse to see her one last time.

"You want us to stay and help unpack?" Phoebe asked, looking around the crammed apartment, the furniture she had gotten from her mom as well as all of her boxes in the small space making it appear even smaller.

"You know, I'm kind of tired," Rachel shrugged. "I might just clear off the bed and call it a night."

"You sure?" Monica asked, and Rachel nodded. "Well, if you need anything, call. Otherwise, Phoebe and I will just see you tomorrow?" Rachel again nodded, and Monica hugged her.

Rachel closed her eyes; this was harder than she thought it was going to be. "I'll miss you," she whispered, and felt Monica nod.

"I'll miss you, too."

The two pulled away slowly, wiping at silent, stubborn tears.

"I know I never technically lived with you, but I'll miss you, too," Phoebe took her turn hugging Rachel.

"Me, too," Rachel replied, pulling back.

"We'll miss having you across the hall," Joey took his turn, and Rachel's heart thudded in her chest. Chandler was next.

Chandler stared at the floor when Joey moved in to hug Rachel. That meant he had no choice but to do the same. Because, as far as everyone else knew, why wouldn't he?

Stepping forward, Chandler offered a slight smile. A smile of apology, both for the awkwardness of the moment, and for what had happened between them. Rachel forced a smile in return, accepting his arms around her. She closed her eyes, breathing in his familiar scent, basking in the familiar warmth of his arms around her. Maybe this was why he had agreed to help her move. This small moment that offered the slightest bit of closure.

"Bye, Rach," he whispered, pulling away before either of them was done with the moment, but needing to be done, since there were four other people in the room, three of whom knew nothing of their brief affair.

When Rachel pulled away from Chandler, she was even more choked up than before, but everyone else attributed it to the sadness of moving, the seeming finality in the ending of an era in her life. So, they left her to her new place, letting her start the newest chapter of her life.

Long after Chandler was gone, Rachel stared at the spot he had been standing in before he hugged her, wondering, briefly, if this had been the right move. If there could have been, if there had been, something there with Chandler, hadn't they had the right to pursue it? And wouldn't the worst-case scenario have been losing everyone? Somehow, Rachel had ended up with that hand anyway.

Taking a deep breath, Rachel reached for the nearest box, ripping it open, not planning on going to bed until everything was unpacked. Because, at the very least, she needed the façade of at least part of her life not being in shambles.

~.~

"You okay, man?" Joey asked Chandler, who was sitting in one of the patio chairs they had gotten from the basement, mindlessly flipping through channels on TV. Chandler hadn't said a word since they got home, and in the past few weeks, Joey had gathered that Rachel's absence and now moving had as much to do with Chandler as it did Ross.

Chandler shrugged, not even turning to face him.

"Do you, uh, want to talk about it?"

Chandler shook his head.

"Well, I, uh, I have a date, so I have to go, but, if you're going to sit here all bummed out, you should at least go across the hall and hang out with Monica. Then both of you can be bummed out together," Joey added. Chandler still gave no response. "I-I know what I said about you guys before, but…I never meant for both of you to end up miserable."

"Drop it, Joe," Chandler finally replied, not turning to face him, not stopping flipping through channels.

"Well, I'll see you later," Joey added, turning and leaving.

Chandler frowned at the screen in front of him. Somehow, Rachel actually leaving, having to go and say goodbye to her, hurt like breaking up with her all over again, in spite of how little he'd seen her in the last month. Or was it because of how little he'd seen her in the last month?

Finally turning off the TV, Chandler stood up, heading across the hall.

Misery loves company, right?

Opening the door, he looked around. Most of the lights were out, but the door had been unlocked, and Monica was nowhere to be seen. Her bedroom door was open, and her room was also dark, so his vision finally landed on Rachel's former door, light shining from beneath it.

He couldn't do it. He couldn't walk in there, even if it was Monica in there, not Rachel.

He really didn't want to go home and sulk alone, though. He might do something stupid like call Rachel. Or show up at her door.

Taking a deep breath, Chandler headed towards the door, knocking softly. When there was no reply, he slowly turned the handle.

"Hey," he offered softly, finding Monica sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall beside the closet.

"Hey," she whispered back, eyes red.

"You…okay?"

Monica shook her head, so Chandler walked over to where she was, sitting down beside her. "She really left," she choked out, and Chandler looked down, feeling more than slightly guilty for being the reason behind that.

"Yea," he started slowly. "But, I'm one hundred percent sure that it had nothing to do with you."

Monica nodded. "Doesn't change the fact that she left."

It was Chandler's turn to nod, unsure of what else to say. "Want to order pizza or something? Brainstorm really cool things to do with your new, empty room?"

"You mean like fill it with a roommate so I can pay rent next month?" Monica shot back. "Sorry, that wasn't directed towards you." Monica paused. He was trying to make her feel better, she didn't need to snap at him because she was mad at Rachel, and, truthfully, mad at Ross for being the reason she had left. "Pizza would be good."

"Yea?" Chandler asked, and Monica nodded, so he stood up, offering a hand to pull her up with him. She accepted his hand, allowing him to pull her up off of the floor, and all but collapsing into his arms as she did.

Chandler squeezed her tightly as Monica buried her face in his chest, trying not to let herself cry. Why was she so upset? She was a grown woman; she should not be this upset about her best friend deciding not to live with her anymore. Except that she knew, deep down, it meant that she would see less and less or Rachel, and she feared that, one day, it would turn into not seeing Rachel at all. She had been phased out of Rachel's life once before.

Chandler kissed the top of Monica's head, running a hand down her back. _Wrong girl_ was all he could think. Wrong girl. Wrong girl to be in his arms. Wrong girl seeking comfort from him, when the right girl was probably just as upset at that very moment. Any feelings he had previously had for Monica suddenly seemed as if they had existed in a different lifetime.

Monica pulled back slightly, locking eyes with Chandler as she did so. Chandler held his breath. She wanted him to kiss her. She was expecting him to kiss her. Because she hadn't been so dense when he was trying to convince her that he would be a good boyfriend as not to realize it hadn't been completely hypothetical. And she was giving him permission to kiss her.

And she was the wrong girl. She didn't smell like Rachel, and she felt different, slightly smaller, in his arms. She didn't smile at him like Rachel or laugh like Rachel.

She was the wrong girl.

Oh, timing was everything.

He thought of the past month. He wondered if it had happened at some other time, if something with Rachel had happened at some other point in time, if it would have worked out.

Or if he would have just kissed Monica when he was trying to convince her he could be a good boyfriend, and she would have kissed back, if none of this would have happened.

Timing was a bitch.

"Pizza?" Chandler finally whispered, disentangling himself from Monica, needing to put space between them.

Monica blinked at him, not expecting him to reject her. She finally nodded slowly. "Sure," she said quietly. "Let's order pizza," she added, turning and heading quickly towards the door, wondering if this day could get any worse.


	12. Moving On

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 12: Moving On**

~.~

Rachel woke up, alone. Completely alone. No TV coming from a living room just outside her bedroom door, no Joey coming over looking for breakfast. No one but herself. She sat up slowly, looking around at her new apartment, nothing completely put away, though she had stayed up half the night trying to unpack and rearrange. She had decided that she needed some sort of shelves to finish the process, though, and maybe a room divider so that she felt less like she was sleeping in her kitchen. And something for the walls… A couple of pictures, maybe some paint? The off-white walls were terrible.

The mental shopping list made Rachel suddenly feel less lonely, and she immediately got out of bed, ready to go max out her credit card, most likely before she even met up with Monica and Phoebe for lunch.

~.~

Rachel spilled through the doorway of her apartment, hands more full from her shopping spree than she had anticipated, and the items in tow didn't include the ones that would be delivered the next day. Glancing at the time, she cursed herself for taking so long, knowing she would be running late to meet Phoebe and Monica. Picking up the phone as she stumbled through the boxes lining her floor, she called Monica.

"Hey, Mon? I'm running late, but I'll meet you guys in half an hour?" Rachel looked around, still mentally piecing her new place together. "Okay, see you there. Yea, okay. Bye."

Red. She was going to paint the wall behind her bed red.

Adding red paint to her mental list, Rachel grabbed her purse and keys, moving boxes out of the way as she headed out to meet Monica and Phoebe.

And, three weeks later, Rachel had a fully-decorated apartment, complete with one red wall, all black furniture and room-divider, and decorated so chicly she would have been proud to have her father come visit without fear of recoil for living in a studio apartment where she was paying more for rent than when she lived with Monica. Okay, well, maybe she would leave that last part out, but other than that she'd be proud to have her dad come visit.

~.~

Chandler stumbled out of his room in the middle of the night, taken back by the fact that there was someone else already in his living room watching the TV he had been getting up to watch. A girl, nonetheless. A girl clad in only a Ranger's jersey. Not that running into a date of Joey's in the middle of the night was something that had never happened, it was just usually more of a going to the bathroom or grabbing a drink of water kind of thing.

"Hey," he offered tentatively.

"Hi," she looked up, slightly startled.

"Sorry, it's just at 2:30 in the morning, I didn't expect to have to fight over the remote…."

She laughed, holding out her hand as Chandler dragged the remaining lawn chair next to her. "I'm Kathy."

"Chandler," he shook her hand.

"Sorry, there's just this Ernie Kovacs thing on in a few minutes that I wanted to watch," Kathy explained her presence.

"Oh my god, that's why I got up, too!"

"You're kidding. I love him!"

Chandler smiled; she didn't seem like the kind of girl Joey normally went after. "So, how'd you and Joey meet?"

"In acting class. They teamed us up as partners. Joey picked three scenes for us to do; all of them had us making out."

Chandler laughed. "Well, that's a good thing, actually, because he used to have me rehearse with him."

Kathy laughed, hitting his arm, and it suddenly struck Chandler that he was flirting with this girl. And, he was pretty sure, that she was flirting back.

"Oh-oh-oh!" Kathy pointed to the screen.

"What, is it on?"

"No, but this Wonder Broom is amazing!" she pointed to the current infomercial.

Chandler jumped up, running to grab his. "Hey!"

"Oh my god!" Kathy laughed, and Chandler smiled, realizing for the first time in nearly two months, he had gone at least a good five minutes without thinking about Rachel.

"Oh, it's on!" Chandler pointed to the screen, hurrying back over to sit beside her. Glancing at Kathy, he wondered if it was the blue light of the TV and the fact that it was the middle of the night that made him feel like there was almost something there.

The chick came out from the bathroom, chirping loudly; Kathy looked at it. "Shh!"

Chandler laughed. Oh, she wasn't like most of the girls Joey brought home. She might be one he wouldn't mind making pancakes for in the morning if Joey snuck out on her, though. Chandler found himself smiling, hoping that would be exactly what happened.


	13. Rooms Full of Elephants

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 13: Rooms Full of Elephants**

~.~

_Came home from an uber-productive day at work to write this entire chapter in one sitting….I know, right? Three updates in a week? Is that what just happened?_

_THANKS for the reviews!_

~.~

"Do you like Kathy?"

Chandler turned quickly to face Joey. "What? That's ridiculous."

"Really? Because that conversation that just happened? For a good hour before she left? That didn't really include me," Joey motioned between Chandler and the door Kathy just walked out of.

Chandler blew out a puff of air, not really having a come back.

"I'm pretty sure she likes you, too," Joey said, as Chandler turned his back to Joey, opening up the refrigerator. Chandler closed the door, turning slowly back towards him. "You should ask her out."

Chandler frowned. "Really?"

Joey shrugged. "She's not the only girl I'm seeing. I'm kind of running late for a date right now," he looked down at his watch. "And," Joey paused, hitting the kitchen counter softly with his balled up fist, "it's the first time since Rachel moved that I've seen you happy. And if she makes you happy…you should go for it."

Chandler still stared at him in disbelief. "Are you serious?"

"Yea," Joey shrugged. "You and her have more in common, anyway…I'm not sure that I always get her jokes…."

Chandler laughed at that, pausing for a moment. "You're really…okay with it?"

Joey again shrugged. "It would be different if we were in a relationship or something, but…we're not. And I love you, man. And you haven't been happy in a long time."

Chandler looked at the ground, touched by the gesture. He scuffed his foot, finally looking up at Joey. "Thanks, Joe," he said quietly.

Joey smiled slightly. "Anytime." Joey thought that through. "Well, hopefully not this _exact_ situation, but, you know what I mean…."

~.~

"We get it, you like Kathy," Monica interrupted Chandler's story, standing up and heading over to the counter for more coffee.

Chandler looked at Phoebe, who just shrugged, just as unsure as he was as to what Monica's problem was.

"Hey!" Ross greeted them, more upbeat than usual as he sat down on the couch that Monica had just stood up from. "You guys won't believe who I ran into at a conference today."

"The only other person on Earth as interested in million-year-old bones as you are?" Chandler quipped.

"You know, sometimes questions are rhetorical," Ross looked at Chandler. "Anyway, I ran into Julie." Chandler and Phoebe stared at him. "Julie," he repeated.

It finally clicked for Chandler. "As in, you picked Rachel over Julie."

Ross nodded slowly. "One and the same."

"How did that go?" Phoebe asked.

"How did what go?" Monica asked, sitting back down with her coffee.

"Running into Julie," Ross replied slowly.

"Julie, Julie?"

Ross nodded. "Anyway, at first it was a little awkward. She asked how Rachel was, and I said I wouldn't exactly know, and then we started talking about a couple of the speakers at the conference and this dig that she went on a few months ago, and…"

"And?" Phoebe urged him on.

"And, we're kinda having dinner tomorrow," Ross smiled. "I forgot how much I had in common with her. I kind of forgot about how it had been with her at all, before…."

Everyone went silent, knowing the end of the sentence was _before Rachel_.

~.~

Rachel was meeting Phoebe for coffee at Central Perk. She said Ross had plans and wouldn't be there, and after a moment of silence, Rachel found it hard to argue with that, unable to ask, _What about Chandler? _and have Phoebe not question it.

So, outside of Central Perk was where Rachel found herself, nearly in tears.

She had stopped before going inside to look through the window, just to peek, just to make sure _he_ wasn't in there.

Rachel found herself completely caught off guard at the site of him. With a girl. She nearly stopped breathing at that, the two of them talking and laughing. They were at a table far enough away from the window and his back was turned enough that he couldn't see her. And Rachel couldn't turn away, not even when the girl reached across the table for his hand, and he took it. Rachel's heart dropped, and she suddenly found herself fighting back tears.

"Are we going in, or…?"

Rachel turned around in a whirl, Phoebe catching her off guard.

"Can we-can we go somewhere else?"

"Rach-"

"Please," Rachel started walking quickly, and Phoebe glanced through the window in the direction Rachel had been looking.

"Rach?" Phoebe attempted to catch up with her.

"Hm," Rachel replied, attempting to nonchalantly wipe at her tears.

"Rach," Phoebe reached out for her arm, and she finally slowed her pace, eventually coming to a stop. "Ross isn't the reason you left, is he?"

Rachel stared at the ground, shaking her head slowly.

Phoebe stared at her for a second, trying to piece together events over the past few months. "Do you want to make going out for coffee going out for drinks instead?" Phoebe asked, and Rachel again shook her head.

"No, because then I'll end up doing something stupid like calling him."

Phoebe looked at her sympathetically. "Rach-"

Rachel shook her head. "I'm fine," she wiped the bottom of her eyes, making sure her makeup hadn't smudged. She didn't need sympathy; she was over him. The site of him with another woman had simply caught her off guard. She was over him. "I'm fine," she repeated a second time, as if that made it any more true. "I'm fine."

~.~

Chandler stared at the woman across from him, trying hard, but not able to focus on the words she was saying. He had been seeing Kathy for nearly three weeks, and though things were going fine, there was just…something. Something that he couldn't put his finger on. He liked her. She was pretty, smart, funny, she could keep up with him joke for joke. Yet, there was something in the pit of his stomach. A feeling. A feeling she wasn't making him feel. A nagging feeling that wouldn't leave him alone. A feeling that he knew why that was.

She wasn't Rachel.

~.~

Rachel stared down her computer screen at work and the name belonging to the sender of the email that had just popped up: Chandler Bing. She thought about trashing it without even opening it, banishing it to wherever in cyberspace deleted emails go. What could he possibly have to say to her?

Rachel momentarily clicked away from it and back to the product report she had been looking through.

Unable to ignore the message, though, Rachel clicked back over to it.

_miss you_

Her breath caught in her throat.

Two words. All lowercase. No period. Miss you.

Rachel bit her bottom lip, trying to hold back the tears the seven letters evoked. Rachel slowly clicked reply.

_You're the one that ended-_

Rachel deleted that.

_I'm sure your girlfriend would be happy to hear that._

Delete.

Rachel sighed, staring at the screen. It wasn't like she had spent the past six weeks pining over him. Other than the night she saw him at Central Perk with the girl she had found out from Monica was named Kathy, she hadn't even been upset over him, hadn't even thought about him. It wasn't like she was absolutely, positively, can't breathe miserable without him.

On the other hand, she did do her best not to think about him, especially after that night.

But, when she would smell someone wearing the same cologne as him, or see something the exact shade of blue as his eyes, or when she would meet Monica for lunch, and Monica would say something about him, there was still this constriction in her chest and sting in the back of her eyes. She still had to force thoughts of him away, because…

_me, too_

Rachel looked at the two words she had typed out, hitting send before she could find it in herself to regret them.


	14. All Moved Up and All Moved On

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 14: All Moved Up and All Moved On**

~.~

_Thank you all for the feedback so far :)_

~.~

"Chandler. Chandler."

Chandler looked up from the spot on his kitchen counter that he had been staring at the second time Kathy said his name.

"You're not really here with me, are you?" she asked, not necessarily mad or accusingly, more like she was simply stating a fact.

Chandler looked down again, feeling slightly guilty.

"It's okay. Really," Kathy stood up from the barstool she was sitting on, one of the few pieces of furniture the guys had added to their empty apartment. "Joey told me you had just gotten out of a relationship, and it was kind of complicated, so…I knew going into this there was someone you weren't quite over," Kathy paused. "But, Chandler, if you can't be here when you are here…maybe you should be with her."

Chandler looked up at her as she grabbed her jacket and purse. "I'm sorry," he said quietly, almost ashamed of the situation.

Kathy smiled, walking back over to him. "Don't be," she replied softly, kissing him on the cheek, glancing back once more before walking out the door.

~.~

Rachel ran her fingers through her hair as she sat down at her desk, running out of hair sooner than she was used to. She had gone, on a whim, and cut her hair to just above her shoulders after work the day before, and she was still trying to decide whether or not she liked it.

Sooner or later, she realized, she was going to run out of things about her life to change.

"Rachel, we're ready for you," Joanna's voice came through the intercom on the phone on her desk.

Rachel took a deep breath as she stood up, ready for her interview for a promotion. Well, at least she wasn't out of things to change yet….

~.~

"This," Joey pointed to his plate "is not food."

"Joey, you once ate a book," Monica pointed out. Thanks to a new job as a food critic, she was treating all of them to dinner. Well, treating may have been too strong of a word in this case.

"I was paid to do that," Joey shook his head.

"Is that waiter carrying breadsticks in his pockets?" Julie pointed out as their waiter walked by.

"Those pants don't have pockets," Phoebe pointed out.

"So, is part of this job actually finishing the meal, or…?" Ross trailed off, and Monica sighed.

"I just need to let them know we're leaving," Monica stood up, heading to let the manager she had spoken to know.

Phoebe looked at Chandler, who had barely said a word all night. Everyone else had assumed it had to do with him and Kathy breaking up, but she had a feeling there was more to it than that. She moved to the seat Monica had just vacated beside him, leaning closer to him. "You're quiet," she said quietly, and Chandler shrugged. "You okay?"

"Sure."

"Wanna talk about it?" she asked, still quietly, but Chandler shook his head. Well, at least Rachel and Chandler were on the exact same page about missing each other, then. "You know, maybe, if there's someone you're that miserable over for so long, you should do something about it," Phoebe added, giving him a knowing look.

Chandler looked at her in surprise, wondering if that meant that she knew something, but before he could question her, Monica came back, and Phoebe moved back to her own seat on the other side of Monica.

~.~

Rachel wiped the sweat from her forehead with a towel, tucking a few rogue strands of hair behind her ears as she walked away from the elliptical and towards the locker room to shower. She had joined this gym a couple of weeks earlier since it was just about halfway between her new apartment and her work, and had signed up for a few classes, deciding she needed to meet some people outside of Phoebe and Monica. Today, though, after the day she had had, her yoga class didn't quite cut it, and after it she took out the remainder of her stress on an elliptical.

And now, she was looking forward to nothing more than showering, putting on her sweats, and going home to eat and go to bed.

"Rachel."

Rachel stopped walking, that voice having been the one she'd least expected to hear. She closed her eyes for a moment, knowing that, after the day she had just had, the smallest thing could send her over the edge, and talking to him would be no small thing.

"Chandler?" she turned slowly to face him.

"He-hey."

Rachel smiled. "No offense, but you are probably the last person in the world who I expected to run into here."

Chandler laughed at that. "Yea, well, I was cleaning out my wallet, and it turns out, I've been a member here for a good three years, and I don't know that I had come here at all since I signed up, so," he shrugged. "I figured I'd might as well get my fifty dollars worth every month…."

"Yea," Rachel looked down. "Well, uh, it was good seeing you," Rachel turned to go.

"Rach, wait," Chandler stopped her, and she turned back towards him.

"Chandler, I've had a really bad day, and-and I don't think I do can this right now."

"Why was your day so bad?"

Rachel sighed at the sincerity behind the question, and found herself unable to ignore it. Either that, or she was glad someone asked, needing to get it off her chest. "Let's see, Joanna got hit by a cab and died, she didn't pass on the promotion that I was supposed to be getting, our department is getting cut in the mean time, so I'm getting demoted instead. And, I feel like a complete bitch, because instead of being upset that my boss died, I'm pissed about my promotion," Rachel ranted.

"Oh my god, I'm sorry…."

"Yea, well," Rachel shrugged. "So, I'm gonna," Rachel pointed in the direction she had been heading in.

"Can I just…say something first?" Chandler asked quietly. Rachel stayed where she was, so he took that as permission. "I miss you. I really, really miss you."

Rachel bit her lip; she did not want to deal with this right now. "Chandler-"

"And I know that we've been through this, but the thing is, I don't want to have to miss you anymore. But I'd rather miss you than get over you, because I don't want to get over you, either," he paused, and she remained silent, staring at the ground. "The other night, I'm at dinner with this girl, and she's pretty and smart and she likes me, and all I can think is…she's not you." Rachel looked up. "And no one else can ever live up to you. You're just—I love everything about you. You're gorgeous, I know you know you are, but you're also so smart, and I don't know that Ross, or you, or anyone else for that matter, ever gives you the credit you deserve for that," he took a step closer to her. "And you're stronger than anyone would ever give you credit for, but you are. You've completely started your life over twice in the past five years. Who has the courage to do that once, but you-you do that twice," Chandler continued. "And I just…I love you, Rachel."

Rachel shook her head. "Chandler, we've been here…."

"But I don't care about anyone else right now," Chandler shook his head. "I want to be with you, to date you. For real, date you. Tell the world. Tell Ross and everyone else. Hell, if you didn't already know and for some reason like my mom, I'd introduce you to my mom. I just-I don't want to live without you, Rach. I don't want to spend the rest of my life wishing I'd given us the chance we deserve."

Rachel blinked back the tears in her eyes. She wanted to tell him no, tell him he missed his chance with her.

"What about Kathy?" Rachel finally asked. Though he had addressed her slightly, if he was still seeing her….

"We broke up," Chandler explained, not questioning how Rachel knew about them.

"I can't-I can't let myself fall for you, just to have it end again, Chandler," Rachel shook her head. "I literally can't do it again."

"It won't happen again. I swear to god, if won't happen again," Chandler took another step closer, taking her hands in his. And she let him. She stared up into his eyes, and with that, completely let her guard down. The man she missed so much it caused actual physical pain to think about him was standing in front of her wanting her back, and she was going to stand there and tell him no? Oh, who was she kidding?

"One condition," she finally whispered.

"Name it," Chandler replied, literally willing to do just about anything in that moment not to have to walk away from her.

"I get the left side of the bed," she smiled, and he laughed, pulling her in, and she nearly collapsed against him. She hadn't known that a hug from him was exactly what she had needed. She ignored how sweaty he smelled and how sweaty she no doubt was, enjoying his arms around her, hands on her back, the warmth of his chest against her cheek, his lips pressed against the top of her head. "I missed you," she whispered, squeezing him tighter before letting go, eyes slightly red when they pulled back.

"Wanna go grab dinner?" Chandler whispered.

Rachel shrugged. "I only have sweats to change into."

Chandler smiled. "I love you in sweats."

~.~

Rachel looked at her reflection in the locker room mirror. Along with only having sweat pants and a Knicks tshirt so old she didn't remember where it came from to change into after she showered (and pink cotton underwear that was so not sex-worthy), she also only had concealer and lip gloss. After running her fingers through her still damp hair, she settled for only lip-gloss. It wasn't like Chandler hadn't seen her without any makeup before, anyway. She gave herself one final look before slinging her bag over her shoulder and heading out to the lobby to meet Chandler.

At the site of him, she couldn't help but smile. He was also in sweat pants and an old Knicks tshirt, gym bag strap across his chest, wet hair sticking up all over the place. He laughed as she got closer.

"Aw, we match," he grinned, wrapping his arm around Rachel as she slipped her arm around his waist, fitting her body against his. She had almost let herself forget, over the past couple of months, how easily their bodies fit together, how easily they seemed to fit together. "Hungry?"

Rachel nodded. "Starving."

~.~

"Wow," Chandler immediately said as Rachel opened the door to her apartment. It was much different than the day they had helped her move in. The décor was completely black and white, very classy, with the exception of one red wall, which added the perfect amount of drama. How very Rachel.

"Good wow?" Rachel asked, setting the Thai takeout they had stopped to get on the kitchen counter.

"Impressive wow," Chandler nodded, setting his gym bag down, as well. He walked over to where Rachel was, having turned on the lights, wrapping his arms around her waist.

Rachel smiled, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Hi," she whispered.

"Hi," he echoed, just as quietly. The moment, the night so far, felt a bit surreal, as if one wrong move could break it and make both of them jerk awake from asleep, alone and in their own beds.

So, he didn't chance ruining the moment with words, and instead kissed her. Anymore talking that needed to be done could wait until morning.

One long, slow kiss melted into the next as they moved slowly back towards her bed. Chandler paused momentarily once they reached it, as if giving Rachel the chance to back out and change her mind. Instead, she slid her hands under the hem of his shirt, and then up his stomach, then chest, pulling his shirt off as she did so. Rachel backed up two steps further, pulling Chandler with her as he slid her shirt over her head, lying down on the bed, and pulling him down on top of her.

~.~

_Chapter title is lyrics from "Angel" by Matt Nathanson.. _

_My marathon is 7 weeks away. Crap. I'm now heading out to run 15 miles…if I come back to an inbox full of reviews, I won't complain. :)_


	15. Another Morning After

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 15: Another Morning After**

~.~

Rachel woke up, the weight of Chandler's arm strewn across her back and warmth of his body pressed up against hers under a mess of sheets reassuring her of the fact that the past night did, in fact, happen. Raising her head slightly to peer at the alarm clock, she noted that they had another twenty minutes before it went off and Chandler had to leave.

Chandler pulled Rachel closer, pressing his lips into her hair.

"Morning," Rachel whispered, rolling over to face him, folding herself into his arms.

"Morning," Chandler replied groggily, eyes still closed. "Can we stay here all day?" Chandler mumbled against her bare shoulder.

"Mmm, I wish," Rachel whispered in reply, not at all excited to start her day in her new position at work. That, and they probably needed to talk to Ross and Monica sooner rather than later.

Maybe they could just stay in bed all day and forget about all of that, though, just for one day. Rachel closed her eyes, toying with that possibility, but the next thing she knew, she must have fallen back asleep, because her alarm clock was going off. Chandler reached over her, switching it off before settling back down beside her.

"The verdict on staying here all day?" Chandler looked at her, and though his tone was joking, his eyes were hopeful.

Rachel smiled. "I really wish I could, but since it's my first day in a new position at work, I probably shouldn't…."

Chandler frowned, though he'd been expecting as much. "What, exactly, happened at work yesterday?"

Rachel sighed, sitting up. "More like what happened at work all week," she started. "I asked Joanna to recommend me for this promotion, and she said she would, and she was even on the hiring committee, but then she just-she stabbed me in the back," Rachel said bitterly. "But, it turns out she only ruined the interview for me because she didn't want to lose me as her assistant, so she created a position for me in her department, and then, bam," Rachel hit her hands together. "She gets hit by a cab." Chandler held back a snicker. "Did you just laugh? The woman got hit by a cab and died!"

"Sorry," Chandler said sincerely. "That just really, really sucks."

"And, that's not even the worst part," Rachel paused, "Okay, there's me being selfish again when a woman just died," she sighed. "But, the worst part is they're eliminating our department for the time being and having some other department take over, and because Joanna basically black-listed me in that interview making me out to be some incompetent bimbo incapable of doing anything but getting coffee, the only open position offered to me was as a personal shopper," Rachel pouted. "Score," she sneered sarcastically.

Chandler looked at her. "Doesn't that mean you dress rich people up?"

"Yea…."

"So, you're basically being paid to shop."

"Well, when you put it that way," Rachel sighed. "It's just a huge step backwards in my career."

Chandler leaned in, kissing her temple. "You'll be fine."

Rachel sighed. "I know, I just had this promotion right in front of me…." She again sighed heavily.

"Hey, if nothing else, that won't be the worst part of your day," Chandler offered. "Because there are a couple of people we probably should talk to today…."

Rachel sighed. "Do we have to?"

Chandler shook his head. "No, I'll just move in here. They'll never notice." Rachel smiled. "But, seriously, I should probably talk to Ross today."

Rachel raised her eyebrows. "You're talking to Ross?"

Chandler nodded. "Yea, I figure it probably needs to come from me."

Rachel nodded. "I should-I should probably talk to Monica," she paused. "I don't know if you know, but she…kinda…"

"Has a thing for me?" Chandler finished for her. "I figured it out," he nodded slowly. Rachel nodded along, wanting to question what, exactly, had led Chandler to that conclusion, but decided that, at least for the time being, she didn't really want to know. Chandler glanced at the time. "I kind of need to get going so I can go home and get ready for work," he leaned down, kissing Rachel once more before he moved to get up, met with a groan of protest.

"Stay here and shower with me?" Rachel whispered quietly, kissing him softly, pulling him back down on top of her.

"Mmm," Chandler hummed against her lips, letting her soft skin against his make the decision for him. "I guess I've been late to work for far less important reasons…."

Rachel closed her eyes, her body flush against his, his forehead leaned against hers. "This is for real this time, right?" she whispered, needing the reassurance, needing him to actually say the words. Because they had been here, right here, before, more than once, and she wasn't sure she could deal with it ending again.

"Swear to god," Chandler whispered in reply, and Rachel opened her eyes at the loss of his body weight from on top of her. "Shower?" Chandler asked as he stood up, and Rachel nodded, laughing as he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her out of bed in one fell swoop and heading into the bathroom.

~.~

Forty-five minutes later, Chandler climbed the stairs to his apartment. He had nothing pressing that morning at work, and had decided the extra time with Rachel that morning was more than worth staying later at work for. As he reached the landing between apartments nineteen and twenty, the door to the latter opened, Joey appearing from behind it.

Joey raised his eyebrows at Chandler, hair still wet, still in his clothes from the night before. "Someone didn't come home from the gym last night," he grinned at him, opening the door to their apartment.

Chandler smiled in return, heading inside.

Joey watched him, still smiling as he headed into his room, reappearing only moments later dressed for work. Chandler glanced at the coffee pot, noticing it hadn't been used that morning.

"There's food and coffee at Monica's, still," Joey said off his look, and again studied Chandler as he walked out the door, returning a few seconds later with a coffee mug in hand. There was something different about him this morning, something calmer than the past couple of months.

Chandler grabbed his briefcase, taking a long drink of coffee, finally looking at Joey, who was still watching him. "What?"

Joey smiled, realization hitting him. "You spent the night with Rachel."

~.~

Chandler peered through the window as he neared Central Perk, and, just as he expected, Ross was already there. He'd called him from work earlier asking if they could meet up after work, and Ross had, of course, agreed, and was now already seated at a table.

Oh, he didn't know what he was in for.

Chandler took a deep breath as he walked into the coffee shop.

"Hey," he smiled at Ross, walking up to the counter to tell Gunther what he wanted before sitting down at the table across from Ross.

"So, what's up?" Ross immediately asked, wondering why, out of the blue on a Thursday afternoon, Chandler had wanted to meet up so badly. It wasn't like he wouldn't have probably seen him later that night anyway, so wanting to talk was…weird.

"See, that's the thing," Chandler started out nervously. "The thing is…"

"What's the thing?" Ross asked.

Chandler took a deep breath; he was just going to come out and say it. "I'm dating Rachel."

Ross laughed. "I'm sorry, I must have misheard you," he laughed again. "It sounded like you said that-that you're dating Rachel." Chandler stared back at him, and Ross stopped laughing. "Wait, what?"

"Ross-"

"No, you're dating _Rachel_?" Ross raised his voice slightly, getting the high-pitched sound to it that both he and Monica got when they were mad. "As in-as in _my_ Rachel."

Chandler stayed calm. "She hasn't been your Rachel in a long time, man."

Ross was visibly getting angrier. He shook his head. "I just-I don't understand. How long has this been going on? I mean, when have you even seen her in the past couple of months? I thought you were dating Kathy up until a few days ago."

"It happened that weekend after we got back from Montauk," Chandler started out. "And it just-it just happened. We went out one night, and we were both really drunk, and it just-it just happened, Ross. I didn't pursue her, she didn't pursue me, it just…happened."

Ross shook his head. "So, what, it's just been going on behind my back this entire time? You've been lying to me this entire time?"

"No, we broke up, because…well, because of you," Chandler looked him in the eye. "I couldn't do that to you."

"But you can now," Ross deadpanned.

Chandler sighed. "It's not like I'm out to hurt you, Ross. I just-I love her. And I can't get past her. And I ran into her last night, and I just…I couldn't let her walk out of my life for good."

Ross closed his eyes, staring into his coffee cup on the table in front of him when he opened them again. "Her moving out," he spoke after a moment of silence, "that wasn't all to do with me then, was it?" Chandler shook his head slowly. Ross took a deep breath, pausing again. He hit the table lightly with a balled up fist, finally shaking his head. "I understand that."

"What?"

"Not being able to let her walk away," Ross finally said quietly, looking up at Chandler. "I understand that." Chandler audibly breathed a sigh of relief. "I'm not saying I'm okay with it or I like it, I just…I understand."

Chandler remained silent, unsure of what to say to that.

"Can I just…can I just give you a piece of advice when it comes to Rachel?"

"Sure."

Ross looked him in the eye, and though it was far from giving him his blessing, it was probably as close as he was going to get to it. "Don't screw it up."

Chandler smiled. "I don't plan on it."

"Chandler, I'm being serious."

"So am I."

They both paused; Ross sighed.

"You really love her?" Ross finally asked, and Chandler nodded.

"More than anything."

Ross again paused, rubbing his temples. "I don't think I get to be mad here, then, do I?" he again sighed, forcing a laugh. "I have Julie, and she's great, and things just work with her, and…things just never did quite work with Rachel, did they? Things between us were just always a little off."

Chandler smiled. "I think I had this exact same conversation with Rachel."

Ross nodded, again silent for a moment. "Just…don't hurt her, okay? Don't make me regret not hitting you right now."

Chandler laughed at that, and Ross finally smiled.

"Oh, hey, Gunther, can I get my coffee?" Chandler asked as Gunther refilled Ross's cup.

"What, because you don't already have everything?" Gunther glared at him before walking away.

Ross laughed at the bewildered look on Chandler's face. "Yea, get used to that."


	16. The Storm Before the Calm

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 16: The Storm Before the Calm**

~.~

_Have I really been working on this story for over a year? My apologies; that's a bit ridiculous. _

_Thanks for the reviews…the end is near!_

_Also, sorry for lack of updates lately…I am in full marathon-training mode and have been running crazy ridiculous amounts lately. 28 days! The end is near for that, too. :)_

~.~

Rachel hesitated outside of the door to apartment twenty, staring at it. She debated knocking, but not once in the past four years had she ever knocked at that door. Now, though, she didn't live there anymore. And being back in the building, back in the hallway, felt like a slight intrusion. Taking a deep breath, Rachel opened the door.

"Hey, Mon," she greeted Monica, who was digging through her purse on the kitchen table.

"Hey," Monica replied, pushing her purse aside. "I'm so glad you called and wanted to do something tonight. I've had the worst few days at work," she sighed, and Rachel took a seat across from her.

"At the new place? Allesandro's?" Rachel asked. Monica had told her about the head chef position she had ended up being offered after giving a terrible review to the restaurant, having the owner come to her apartment to tear her apart because of it, and ultimately cooking him dinner.

"Yea," Monica sighed. "Apparently, the guy I got fired was related to ninety percent of the staff, so," Monica shrugged, again sighing heavily. "Last night, they kept making up fake specials that I then had to prepare, and then today, I thought it was getting better, because everyone kept smiling at me all day, but," Monica pulled her crumpled up chef's hat out of her purse and held it up to reveal the words 'quit bitch' written across the front of it.

"Oh, Mon, I'm sorry," Rachel reached across the table, touching her hand.

"And I can't just quit, because this is a job I've been dreaming about my entire life, so I just keep thinking it has to get better eventually," Monica twisted the hat in her hands.

Rachel looked down at the table. How as she supposed to tell Monica about Chandler right now?

"Well…at least it can't get any worse?" Rachel offered.

Monica laughed. "God, I hope not."

_Oh, but it can_, Rachel thought, taking a deep breath. She closed her eyes, pressing her thumb into her temple. She had to tell her now. They agreed not to keep it a secret this time. "Hey, um, I, um, I kind of had something I wanted to talk to you about…."

"What?" Monica asked, slightly uneasy at Rachel's demeanor. Rachel didn't answer, eyes still closed. "Rach, what is it?" Monica asked, this time sounding more concerned.

Rachel laughed shortly, only because Monica's concern was sure to be short-lived. "Okay," Rachel clapped her hands together. "The beginning. We'll start from the beginning."

"Beginning of what?"

"Or the end, I could start with the end."

"Rach."

Rachel sighed, looking at her hands on top of the table. "Chandler and I," she started slowly, "we're…we are…."

"You're what?" Monica asked, the thought of the two of them together having obviously never crossed her mind since she didn't even begin to put it together.

"We're together."

Monica frowned. "You're what?"

Rachel sighed. "We're together. Dating," she added, pausing to let that fact sink in.

Monica shook her head. She looked down, trying to decide how to react. "Why do you have to do that? Why do you have to go after a guy, just because I like him? You've done it ever since first grade with Drew McMillan!"

"Monica, I didn't know you liked him back! If I did-"

"Whoa, liked him _back_?" Monica cut her off. "He practically shot me down-oh my god," Monica trailed off, shaking her head as realization sank in. She replayed the night with Chandler in Rachel's room after Rachel moved out, only this time, she replayed how upset Chandler was, and how, even though she had shot him every signal she knew how to send, Chandler hadn't kissed her, and had done his best to get as far away form her as possible, despite earlier advances from him that gave her a different impression. She replayed the night from a Chandler-missing-Rachel perspective. "You're the reason," Monica trailed off. "He's the reason you left, not Ross," Monica finally looked up at Rachel for confirmation. Monica again shook her head, taking Rachel's silence as confirmation. "I just-I cannot believe you," Monica stood up.

"Monica-"

"I can seriously fill up my fingers on both hands with guys you did this with! I like a guy, and then you have to swoop in and be all I'm-Rachel-Green-and-I-can-have-any-guy-I-want and take him."

"Mon-"

"You know what, I thought you'd gown up since high school, especially in the past four years, but maybe not," Monica pushed her chair back in, storming off to her room, leaving Rachel behind.

Rachel sighed, still sitting at the table. "Well, that went well," she mumbled, wondering if she should wait there for Monica to come around, or if she should just call it a night and head over to Chandler's, giving Monica time to cool down.

~.~

"Hey," Chandler smiled, seeing Rachel sitting on one of the chairs Chandler had broken down and bought the week before, though the two chairs and a slightly nicer TV were the only furniture in the room, still.

Rachel smiled. "You bought furniture."

"Well, I got tired of sitting on the ground," Chandler sat down on the arm of the chair, and Rachel snuggled up to him. "How was work?" he leaned down, kissing the top of her head.

"Been better," Rachel sighed, not offering anything else.

"How was talking to Monica?"

"Not great. She stormed out and isn't talking to me," Rachel sighed. "How was talking to Ross?"

Chandler shrugged, sliding down onto the chair as Rachel moved over. "Could have been much worse." Rachel again sighed, still staring straight ahead. "What are you thinking?"

Rachel frowned. "Well, right now, I'm thinking of ordering pizza and watching this Molly Ringwald marathon that's on the rest of the night," Rachel pointed at the TV screen, "and dealing with everything else tomorrow."

"I could watch some _Sixteen Candles_," Chandler nodded at the screen.

"_Breakfast Club_ is next."

Chandler smiled. "Well, I can't say no to _Breakfast Club_."

Rachel settled down in the chair with Chandler, a calm she had been missing the rest of the day overtaking her, everything about her bad week melting away as she cuddled up beside him.

"Chandler?"

"Hm?"

Rachel smiled, her first smile she could remember since he left that morning. "I love you."

Chandler smiled, kissing her again. This, right here, was exactly what he'd been missing and needing for the past couple of months. "I love you, too."


	17. My Best Friend's Girl

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 17: My Best Friend's Girl  
**

~.~

_Didn't think I would have time to update this week, but thanks to some food poisoning, I'm home from work today, so, you guys lucked out. Me, on the other hand…._

~.~

Monica dug through her freezer, finally pulling out the cardboard box she had been in search of. Peeling off the lid to the frozen yogurt, Monica made a face. It was not quite the ice cream she had been searching for, and it was a little more freezer burned than she would consider edible. Throwing the carton in the trashcan, Monica sighed. She had cleaned the entire apartment the day before, but tonight might call for cleaning it again.

"Hey!" Phoebe greeted Monica. "What's up?"

"Oh, what's up," Monica laughed bitterly, slumping down in one of the kitchen chairs.

Phoebe looked at her, wondering if she had found something out, but not wanting to stick her foot in her mouth if not. Monica looked back questioningly.

"Do you know?" Monica finally asked.

Phoebe shrugged, playing aloof, a part she played all too well. "Do I know what?"

"Phoebe."

Phoebe nodded slowly, taking a seat across the table from Monica.

"How long?"

"How long, as in, how long have I known, or how long, as in, how long have they…"

Monica shrugged. "I don't know that I want to know the answer to either."

Phoebe looked at her sympathetically. She had always truthfully thought it would end up being Ross and Rachel and Monica and Chandler, not Rachel and Chandler. When Chandler had spent the week after they returned from the beach trying to convince Monica he could be a good boyfriend, Phoebe had thought that was it. Because Monica played back to him. And she thought…

Well, judging from the crushed look on Monica's face, she thought something along the same lines as Monica had been thinking. But…

But, seeing how upset both Chandler and Rachel had been apart, Phoebe had rethought all of that.

Monica rubbed her temples, closing her eyes. "He wasn't mine," she finally whispered. "I know that, I do. I just," she sighed, shaking her head. "I always thought he was more mine than hers. And, after everything at the beach, and then everything after we got back, I just assumed," Monica trailed off. "I don't know. I assumed something was going to happen with us. I always thought we were just this close," she held up her finger and thumb, less than an inch apart, "to something happening."

Phoebe offered a sympathetic smile. "Me, too."

Monica sighed. "What am I supposed to do here?"

Phoebe looked up, hesitating. "Do you want me to tell you what you want to hear, or what you need to hear?"

"Honestly," Monica hesitated. "Neither."

Phoebe paused before speaking. "You're supposed to be okay with it," she finally said. "Because you and Chandler aren't anything more than friends. Almost doesn't really count for anything. And they were both completely miserable when they broke up and she moved out." Phoebe paused. "And, I know you love both of them, so…."

Monica sighed, staring down at the table. "Then why do I hate both of them so much right now?"

~.~

Chandler and Rachel both looked up from their spot, cuddled up in Chandler's chair, as the door opened, Rachel half-hoping it was Monica coming over to talk to her.

"Hey," Joey greeted them, walking over to the kitchen counter. "Aw, are you two back together?" he grinned, motioning between them.

They both smiled and nodded in return before turning back to the movie they were watching.

"Ooh, _Breakfast Club_!" Joey moved over to his chair, sitting down in it and pulling a sandwich out of the sack he had be carrying. "_Breakfast Club_ and a meatball sub, not the worst way to end a day," he said, more to himself than the other two in the room. "Wait, does everyone know about this," he again motioned to Chandler and Rachel, turning to face them, "this time?"

"Yes, everyone knows," Chandler replied.

"Good," Joey smiled. "And now you can quit moping."

"I have not been moping," Chandler immediately shot back.

Joey looked at Rachel, nodding when Chandler turned away and mouthing, "he was moping."

Rachel nodded slightly back to Joey. "I'm sure you weren't," she replied to Chandler.

"Hey, do you think Ross knows that one song? By The Cars?" Joey laughed after a moment of silence, looking back over to them. "She's my best friend's girl…She's my best friend's girl, and she used to be mine," he sang, laughing to himself, but receiving two glares in return. "What? Too soon to joke about it?" They both just stared back in response. "Fine, I'll just leave you two to your movie and go finish my meatball sub around people who do appreciate my humor," Joey stood up, still holding onto his sandwich, taking a bite as he walked out the door.

"I may have moped a little over the past couple of months," Rachel finally said quietly.

Chandler smiled slightly, moving so he could look at her. "Yea?"

"Yea," Rachel replied softly.

Chandler nodded his head. "Me, too."

"I know I said I didn't want to talk about this tonight, but…do you think Monica will come around?"

"Definitely," Chandler nodded. "I mean, Ross got over it in about two minutes, why wouldn't she?"

"Sophomore year of high school, I dated this kid, Nick Tennisson, who she had a crush on. Well, her and about half of our class. And she didn't speak to me for the whole two and a half weeks that we went out."

Chandler laughed. "You don't think you've both grown up a bit since then?"

Rachel shrugged solemnly, looking back at the TV.

"Maybe I should talk to her," Chandler finally said.

"Maybe not tonight…"

"Oh, definitely not tonight," Chandler laughed, having no intention of doing so. "I don't exactly have a death wish…"

~.~

Monica walked through the front door of her building, rounding the corner slowly as she headed towards Central Perk. She had been more or less avoiding Rachel and Chandler for the past few days (more "more" than "less"), and she had no intention of making up with them at the moment. Sometime in the near future, but today wasn't that day. She hadn't worked herself up to it yet. Because even though she had admitted to Phoebe that she knew Chandler hadn't been hers, and she knew that meant she shouldn't be mad…she wasn't ready to admit that to anyone else. And just because she knew she shouldn't be mad didn't mean she wasn't mad.

Mad, and a little bit of hurt.

Because Chandler hadn't been hers, but he had been more hers than Rachel's. For a whole lot longer than he had even been Rachel's. There had been something there with her and Chandler for years, how dare Rachel swoop in one day and decide she wanted him? Although, technically, he hadn't been hers, so….

And there were the circles she talked herself into that led her to not yet forgiving them.

Looking inside Central Perk before walking in, Monica stopped, watching Chandler and Rachel, who were standing by the couch, obviously about to leave. She assumed Rachel had spent the night with Chandler since they were both dressed for work. A lump forming in her throat, Monica's heart dropped as a realization set in: Rachel and Chandler even looked good together. Rachel in her skirt suit and Chandler in his suit, briefcase in hand, they made a very good-looking power couple. She had always envied Rachel as someone who could turn heads, but in the last few years, Chandler had really grown into someone who, if he had even an ounce more confidence, could surely turn just as many heads.

And…they did have a lot in common. They both came from rather well-off families. Their parents were both divorced. Neither of them quite had the whole relationship thing down. Neither of them was exactly happy in their current career situation. And she knew both of them well enough to know that they were both smarter than anyone really gave them credit for.

Rachel ran her fingers through Chandler's hair, and Chandler leaned in to kiss her softly before turning towards the door.

Monica forced down the lump in her throat, still watching. Maybe, if Monica had wanted him badly enough, maybe…maybe, she should have said something to Chandler sooner. She should have made a move at some point in the past ten years. She shouldn't have joked with him about not being boyfriend material. Maybe…if Rachel had gone after him when she wanted him…maybe Rachel deserved to have him.

Monica wanted to move, wanted to run in the opposite direction so she wouldn't still be standing there when Chandler came out the door, but she suddenly found herself unable to move. So, when the door swung open, Chandler appearing through it, she was still there.

Chandler stopped walking at the sight of her, hesitating slightly. "He-hey," he offered softly, awkwardly. Monica seeing him with Rachel felt a bit like being caught doing something he knew he shouldn't be doing. Because he knew he was hurting Monica, and he didn't want to hurt Monica.

But he loved Rachel.

And Monica had her chance.

Monica bit her lip, forcing herself to make eye contact. Just looking him in the eye made her want to cry, because, whether or not she deserved to feel it, she felt slightly betrayed by him. She took a deep breath, forcing all of those feelings away, attempting to keep all of her emotions in check. "Hey."

~.~

_Thank you so much to all of you who reviewed the last chapter! 35 people have a story alert for this story…35! My stats are what are keeping my going right now, because, while my stories have more hits right now than for the majority of the past two years that I've been back, I've gotten far fewer reviews. Which, while I don't write for the reviews, does make it a bit harder. So, if you are one of the couple hundred people who read my last chapter, and liked it enough to come back and read this chapter, if you could leave a quick review, that would be awesome. No pressure, it just makes my day. :)_


	18. Arms

**Sometime Around Midnight**

**Chapter 18: Arms**

~.~

_In the past month, I've: run my first marathon, adopted a 9-week-old puppy, stepped down from management at work, attempted to finish planning our wedding reception, and tried to save a tiny sliver of sanity in the process. My apologies for the delay in updating…that was not my intent. _

_Thank you ALL for the reviews! It was also not my intent to guilt anyone into reviewing, but I'm happy for the reviews I got out of it, ha :)_

_My thanks to friendsfan101 for the title of the chapter…great song by Christina Perri that fits Randler perfectly :)_

~.~

"Hey," Chandler repeated to Monica, surprised to actually be seeing her.

"Hey," Monica echoed back, the two moving out from in front of the doorway to Central Perk in awkward silence. They both stared at the ground, backs against the brick wall.

"I'm sorry, Monica," Chandler finally started, and she looked up slowly. "If I hurt you-_that_ I hurt you. That was never my intention. I just-"

"Can I say something first?" Monica interrupted him, and he nodded slowly. Monica took a deep breath, having not planned on saying this just yet, but this seemed like as good an opportunity as any. "I don't think you really need to be sorry," she finally choked out, a whisper barely audible over the morning traffic rushing by them.

"What?" Chandler took a step closer, partially not hearing her, but also not used to Monica admitting fault.

"You don't need to be sorry," she repeated, slightly louder as she looked up at him. "This may be the first and last time I ever admit to being wrong," she gave him a slight smile, which he returned, "but I have no right to be mad at Rachel, or at you, for any of this. You weren't-you were never mine. You weren't mine to be taken from me. I don't-I don't have any right to be mad at either of you for anything."

"Mon," Chandler said softy. "I might not have been yours, but it's wasn't like there was never…it's not like we never…" Chandler trailed off as he motioned between the two of them, unable to find the right words.

Monica nodded. "I know," she breathed out slowly. "But we never, really, were," she whispered slowly, also motioning between them. "So, I don't get to be mad," she shook her head, looking down.

"I'm still sorry I hurt you," Chandler repeated, sincerely, his hand brushing her arm, and Monica only nodded, tears in her eyes from the sincerity in his voice.

"I know," Monica nodded. "I'm sorry, too."

"Are we okay?" Chandler asked softly, and Monica nodded, not looking up at him.

"We will be."

"Are you and Rachel okay?" Chandler added, that relationship and how upset Rachel was about it being his main concern. Because he cared about Monica and about his friendship with Monica, but Monica and Rachel's relationship seemed more important than that.

Monica again nodded, speaking softly. "We will be."

Chandler watched her for a moment longer, finally glancing down at his watch. "I have to get going, Mon," he whispered, and the only response she again gave was a nod. "I am sorry," he added one last time, and Monica finally looked up, smiling slightly. "I'll see you later?"

Monica nodded, swallowing tears and her pride. "Yea, I'll see you later."

~.~

"Hey."

Rachel looked up, startled to hear Monica's voice. "Hey," Rachel replied, scooting over on the over-sized couch at Central Perk, though there was room for Monica to sit without her doing so.

Monica sat down slowly, tucking her hands beneath her legs, crossing her legs, making herself as small as possible, since that's how she felt at that moment. She took a deep breath, staring down at the table in front of them. Not once in her multiple-decade-spanning friendship with Rachel had she ever admitted defeat, admitted fault. Not once.

"I'm sorry," Monica stated, looking up at Rachel, who was silent in response, taken back by Monica apologizing.

"What-I-"

"I'm sorry for overreacting," Monica added. "I have no right to be mad at either of you. I have no claim over Chandler…He was never mine to be mad about you taking."

Rachel paused, biting her lip. "He was more yours than mine, though."

"That was my rationale!" Monica's eyes lit up, and they both laughed. "I really am sorry, though," Monica added. "Seriously. I should have been happy for you both, and instead, I was sulking and mad at both of you. If you're happy, then I'm happy for you."

"Thanks," Rachel smiled. "I'm sorry that I didn't say anything to you sooner, too. I mean, I could have, I just," Rachel shook her head. "It was new and exciting and unexpected, and neither of us knew where it was going, and I didn't want to hurt you, and he didn't want to hurt Ross, and," Rachel shrugged. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner." Monica nodded. "And I didn't want to hurt you, I didn't, I just…I love him." Monica again nodded. "I love him," Rachel stated a second time, more to herself than any audience.

"Then I'm happy for you," Monica choked out, it not being in her nature to be the bigger person. "I mean, I wish you luck, since it's Chandler and all," she laughed, and Rachel laughed as well, understanding the meaning behind it. "But, I am happy for you. For both of you."

Rachel smiled. "That means a lot coming from you."

Monica returned her smile, and the two sat in awkward silence for a moment.

"Can we hug and have this not be awkward anymore?" Rachel finally asked, motioning between them, and Monica laughed and nodded, the two of them hugging, wiping nonchalantly at their eyes as they pulled away.

"If you guys get married, do I have the best Maid of Honor speech, or what," Monica joked, the two of them laughing, perhaps a bit too hard for how funny the joke had been, until they had laughter to blame for the tears in their eyes instead of any previous reason.

~.~

Rachel curled up next to Chandler in her bed, glad that she had found the one thing that made her apartment feel complete and like home.

"Hey, babe," Chandler mumbled, already half-asleep, wrapping his arms around her as she fit her body against his.

"Hey," Rachel responded, kissing him lightly on the mouth before settling down beside him, closing her eyes, content to sleep there with him.

"I'm sorry," Chandler interrupted the comfortable silence.

"For what?"

"For pushing you away so many times," Chandler opened his eyes, shifting so he could look down at her.

"Chandler-"

"No, I know I said it before, but I really am sorry that I'm such an idiot…."

"If that's the case, I'm sorry, too," Rachel added, "for not stopping you."

"At least you tried."

"Chandler," Rachel reached out, touching his cheek lightly. "Okay," she finally said, "here's the deal. Tonight, you can be sorry, and I can be sorry, but starting tomorrow, we're done apologizing, and we're moving on to whatever comes next. Deal?"

Chandler nodded, pretending to mull that over. "So, tonight I can be sorry for being such an amazing singer that you totally wanted to make out with me after hearing me sing karaoke?"

Rachel smiled back playfully, nodding. "And I can be sorry for getting you drunk in Montauk and making you kiss me."

"And I can be sorry for kissing you in the rain…."

"And I can be sorry for going back to your place with you…."

Chandler smiled, licking his lips. "And I can be sorry for being scared to death to admit that I've been falling for you since about that very moment, and that it scares me even more, but I can't imagine any of my foreseeable future without you in it," he finished, shyly.

"Chandler Bing, I think you may be a hopeless romantic."

"I'm sorry for that, too, then," he grinned, eyes shining in the moonlight shining through the slits between her blinds.

"I'll allow it," Rachel countered with a grin, closing her eyes as his lips captured hers, his hand on her hip, pulling her closer until she was on top of him. "I love you," she whispered, lips still against his, body flush against his, his arms securely around her.

She felt his lips curl into a smile, not moving any part of his body further from hers and the comfortable embrace of entangled limbs and hearts they were currently a part of as he whispered in reply.

"I love you, too."

~.~

_C'est tout!_

_Final reviews are always appreciated :) Thanks for sticking with me through yet another story…you all rock!_


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